Summertime Sadness
by GoodyGollyMissMoxley
Summary: Based off the Lana Del Rey song, Delia goes to college. Jon and her's relationship spirals downard. How will they get it back, if they can? AU: OC!/Jon Sequel to Anomalous.
1. Chapter 1

Jon didn't want to be here, wearing the nicest clothes he owned. His head pounded in his skull and he took a few minutes to himself outside of the stuffy house to breathe. He had gotten used to being around Delia's family. The snobby ones, the very well-to-do one's, even. He could see Delia through the bay window walking towards him on the front porch, she would be leaving him soon to go off to college. He didn't like the idea of not having her around but he'd just have to deal with it, he was proud of her for going to further her education.

"Hey," Her soft voice broke through his thoughts as he watched her walk further towards him. His heart pounded, she looked so fucking good. Her dress hugged her body nicely, her hair was done up in a bun and some strands of her blonde hair hung down around her face. Her lipstick matched her red dress. She looked damned good.

He shoved his hands in his front pockets and leaned against the pole, "Hey yourself."

She leaned up against his chest and wrapped her arms around his waist, breathing his scent deeply.  
"Thank you for coming tonight."

"Why you thankin' me for? Of course I'd come for you." He mumbled against the top of her head, wrapping his arms tightly around her. They only had a few more hours together and he wanted to spend them being selfish.

"Because I know you don't really like being around my family."

"I'll do it for you," He mumbled against her lips before kissing her sweetly, their heads moving to get a better range on the other's lips. She could have melted into him right then and there, feeling his tongue dominate her mouth. She whimpered against his lips, feeling his large hands move down to squeeze her ass. She brought her hand up to the side of his neck, pulling him further down against her lips.

"Delia," Her mother cleared her throat behind them – neither of them had realized she was standing behind them. They were too lost in each other and in their kiss to notice anything else around them. Immediately, Jon's hands fell from her ass and Delia' blushed from being caught in an intimate moment.

"Yeah mom?" She grinned.

"People are going to be leaving soon, you two should come and say goodbye to everyone." Her mother smiled at them. Delia nodded and wrapped her arms back around his waist. Jon waited before her mother walked back into the house before speaking,  
"Your mother is fucking creepy, babe."

Delia chuckled, "How?!"

"She doesn't make any noise when she walks."

"Let's go get this over. When we get home," He chuckled softly in her ear and ran his hands down her sides, "You're mine."

Delia smiled and followed him into the house, holding his hand tightly. She was going to hate not waking up beside of him in the morning, but that's a part of life. She'll be okay, she has to be. This is how life works. You fall in love with someone, get used to being with them, and then something hurts the chance. Or at least that's how Jon's life went, anyway.

* * *

Delia looked up at him through tear filled eyes. She didn't want to leave him, she didn't want to leave this bedroom. His kisses were so soft at first but had quickly turned rough and hungry – like he needed to engulf himself in her. She clutched at his arms, moaning into the kiss. She could have crawled inside of him in that moment and just stayed there until she felt it was safe to leave his arms again. He was the best she'd ever felt him and she solely based it off the fact that she had to leave in under twenty-four hours. They might have been young, but it didn't mess with the fact that they both had gotten so involved in each other over the last few months that they rarely done stuff with any of their friends. Jon had become her life, and she wasn't complaining about that, but she didn't want to go to college.

**_ Kiss me hard before you go  
Summertime sadness  
I just wanted you to know  
That, baby, you're the best_**

As soon as Jon saw her earlier that night, her red shimmer dress accentuating every curve her body gave, he knew he had to get her away from everyone at the 'going-away-to-college-party' her parents had thrown for her. Red was her color, she looked so fucking good in his eyes. She was beautiful always to him but something about that red dress just made him want to rip her to shreds. He trailed his lips down her neck, biting over her collarbone. She wrapped her legs tightly around him, feeling his lips kissing down her nude flesh. His lips were soft but the rest of his face was scratchy from the slight stubble he had grown out.

"You just wanted to tear me apart earlier, didn't you? That slutty fucking red dress, I swear to god Delia I could've pushed you against the wall and fucked your right there for everyone to see." Jon heard her gasp at his words; good, he thought. He wanted her hot and rugged as he was, if that was possible. The red dress wasn't fair to him, it was one that laid off his shoulder on both sides and stopped just above her knees. She had on matching red leather pumps that he hadn't allowed her to take off.

"My dress done this to you?" She gasped, feeling the wetness pool between her legs now.

He smiled, "You don't understand how fucking beautiful you looked. It looked so good on you, D."

"Thank you," She said breathlessly.

"I wanna taste you," Jon moaned against her neck, grinding his hips down into her. He smiled when he felt her tighten her legs around him, "I've got to taste that pretty fucking pussy."

She gasped, "Please Jon. Please. I want you too."

He smiled, feeling her fingers tug at his hair. Teasingly, he kissed down the front of her body, her nails scraping against his back as he moved further down. He was greeted with a wave of her scent, she smelt sweet and sexy, just like she always did for him, and his cock hardened in anticipation of tasting her. He inhaled her scent as he trailed his tongue over the soft linen panties covering her lips, causing her to gasp and slightly buck her hips down against his face. He placed his mouth around her clothed mound, sucking as much of her pussy as he could in his between his lips.

He couldn't stand the barrier anymore and he hooked his fingers in the waist band of her panties before pulling them down and off her soft legs. He kissed the top of her foot and licked up to her ankles, taking in the view of her pussy glistening wet for him. He trailed his tongue all the way up her calf, up her inner thigh, and all the way up to the bottom of her – leaving a trail wherever his tongue touched.

His tongue trailed in a circle over her outer lips, tasting her properly. She squirmed underneath his teasing, rolling her body up to meet his mouth. She grinned as she heard him chuckle at her pleas – god she wanted him so badly. He trailed a long wet lick from the bottom of her to the top of her clit, wanting to savor the taste of her. He didn't know the next time he'd taste her, or when he'd have her like this again, and he moaned around her.

"Jon," Delia gasped, "Please…I need you so bad."

He stayed between her thighs, licking, sucking, devouring, and taking everything she gave him. They had all night, only a few more hours together, before she would be off to college and he'd only have her on the weekends when they could meet in the middle. He didn't like the empty feeling it left him with, but this was her life and he would be happy for her regardless.

**_I got my red dress on tonight  
Dancing in the dark in the pale moonlight  
Done my hair up real big beauty queen style  
High heels off, I'm feeling alive  
Oh, my God, I feel it in the air  
Telephone wires above are sizzling like a snare  
Honey, I'm on fire, I feel it everywhere  
Nothing scares me anymore_**

Delia arched to him, curving to his body as he thrust into her. She'd changed so much for him, she'd only ever given herself to him. This was her happy place, buried underneath his etching gaze and his warm body. She could live underneath him if it were possible. She was hooked on him, she could only find solstice in anything in his arms. He completed her, as cheesy as it was to say. She didn't know how she would adapt to the college life and life without him – for she couldn't recall what it felt like to live without him before. Jon's thrusts were long and deep, slow and antagonizing almost; she felt every inch of him. He was so hard for her, thrusting so deep. Jon growled and buried his face in her neck. All too soon, she was going to have to leave him. She was going to take every bit of this moment in.

* * *

"I don't want to leave you," Delia whispered into Jon's chest as he stood at the edge of her car.

Jon held her tighter, kissing the crown of her head. "I don't want you to leave either pretty girl but I know that you're going to make me proud."

She clung to him tighter, she didn't even want to let go of him long enough to hug her parent's goodbye. She felt tears welling up, even though she promised not to cry, she couldn't help the tears forming. He tilted her head back and kissed her softly, sucking her lips to his. He nibbled on her bottom lip, holding onto her hips. She didn't care that her parents were standing beside of them; she didn't give a fuck that they were standing in front of other people. She wanted to remember how he tasted.

"I love you," Delia whispered against his lips, "I love you so much Jon."

"I love you too," He mumbled into her mouth, "Go baby girl."

She clung to him even tighter, burying her face in his chest. He had on a grey t-shirt, the one she fondly remembers him wearing underneath his work-shirt the night he made her a woman, taking what she gave him willingly. He was already dressed for work, it was before sunrise. She hoped he'd be okay, she knew he was a lot stronger than she was. She felt him press his nose into the top of her head and inhale the scent of her blonde hair before stepping away from her.

**_I've got that summertime, summertime sadness  
S-s-summertime, summertime sadness  
Got that summertime, summertime sadness  
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh_**

Delia hugged her mother goodbye and then sadly returned to Jon who wrapped his arms around her looser this time. With one more kiss, she was then walking towards her car. She had to get a move on if she wanted to make it to her new home in time for orientation. She looked back at him one last time before getting into the car. He nodded at her and looked down at his feet; he wasn't going to fucking cry in front of her but he felt that nagging sensation at the base of his throat and fought against it.

"I love you, Jon." She said softly, her parents had already started heading to their cars.

Jon shook his head, pushing his hands in his pockets. He didn't understand how or why she had this effect on him. "I love you too."

He heard the car door close and he knew she was getting to leave him in a trail of her dust on the dirt road. If he knew she was just going to leave at the end of summer, he'd never had fixed her car in the first place. He knew he couldn't be selfish, especially when it came to her education. He wanted to give a better life, he had provided over half of her college funds secretly. Her parents didn't have enough and had came to him for help. He wasn't going to hinder her possibilities to become more than him, more than this town. He knew she had it in her to become something great. He'd help her along the way. He had the money built up to do so. Shit, he'd do anything for her.

That's only if she came back, though.

* * *

Delia scared and nervous as she sat in her first college class. She felt herself trembling, she knew absolutely no one in here. The sound of old creaking wood became louder as students filled the class room even more. This felt weird – she felt like a grown up. She ran her hands through her hair and looked down at the picture of her and Jon that was taken around the fourth of July by her mother, she was sitting on his lap and he had his arms wrapped around her as they both watched the fireworks, his lips pressed to the back of shoulder.

Jon had acted different lately. She knew he was still grieving the loss of his grandfather. He was also under a lot of stress from running the shop short-handedly. She tried her hardest to help him out but she felt like she would get in the way at the shop. No matter what, she promised she'd love him through it all. He had spells of insanity, he'd go into shouting rages and more than once he'd beat the fuck out of a customer. He had a lot of rage built up in him, but she knew that he loved her.

"Hey…uh, is this seat taken?" A deep voice boomed from ahead of her. She looked back to see a bleach-blonde boy with a huge grin on his face.

Delia pushed her bag to the floor to give him more room and smiled politely, "No. It's yours."

"I'm Adam," The guy said and stuck his hand out.

She didn't really want to touch him but she shook it anyway, "Delia, it's nice to meet you."

"Oh, likewise pretty girl!" He grinned.

* * *

_**This sequel's going to be good...I promise. **_


	2. Chapter 2

Jon slammed the hood of the car, nothing was going the way he wanted it to tonight. He drummed his long fingers over the hood of the car and looked around at everyone working quietly. There was a huge tension in the air and he knew he had created it. He sighed. It'd been two weeks since Delia had left and he missed her more now than ever. He pushed himself away from the car and walked back into the office, slamming the door behind him. He had a constant headache, he felt like something was wrong but he couldn't put his finger on just what it was other than the lack of Delia in his life. He hated it. He hated the distance and not being able to see her. Conversations on the phone were cut short due to the fact that she had a lot of studying to do and he wanted her to be completely focused.

His phone beeped in his pocket causing him to snap back into reality. He groaned and dug into his pocket, pulling the phone and looking at the screen. He smirked and tossed it back down on the desk, no one important and not the one he wanted to hear from. It's as if Delia didn't even fucking care anymore.  
He took a few deep breathes in and calmed himself down, there was no sense in getting so pissed off he thought. She was a girl; she was more than likely studying or taking a nap. He tapped his fingers on the desk rapidly, closing his eyes to try to clear his mind. He just needed to rest, he thought.

_Maybe she's cheating on you, Jon. Ever thought about that, huh? You know you're nothing but a worthless piece of shit anyway, she's too good for you. You'll never see the day that you're on her level, you're everything everyone's always called you._

"No," He said in a soft whisper, shaking his head. He wasn't going to let that come back, that voice was probably just his nagging conscious. He lit up a cigarette and sucked it profusely, his nerves were frayed. He had to talk to her. He needed to talk to her. He knew that getting attached to someone like this would have fucked him up in the long run and he had told himself that he wouldn't let it get this bad. He couldn't let this shit happen again; he couldn't let that voice win again.

* * *

Delia looked around the campus. It had been two weeks since her arrival and she still hadn't gotten used to everything. She knew how to get to her dorm, to the food services available, and to the classrooms. She looked around and sighed, feeling her phone vibrating in her pocket reminding her that missed call from Jon. She cursed herself for forgetting and instantly called him back, waiting for his voice to answer on the other end.

Everything around her buzzed, this was a scary world being out on your own. Other's laughter rung through her mind, people walked past her seemed to blur, and for a split moment she thought she was going crazy until she heard the disgruntled, "Hello?"

She took a deep breath and smiled, "Jon…"

"I tried calling you earlier." He sounded pissed.

"Yeah…I know you did…I was in class and I forgot about it."

All she got was a slight grunt and a sarcastic chuckle.

"Jon, I'm sorry."

"Whatever," He shook his head a brought the joint back up to his mouth, "What are you doing?"

"Walking back to my dorm," She frowned, "What are you doing?"

"Nothing," He kept his answers short. They talked until she got to her dorm. All she got was grunts and 'yes' or 'no' and one-worded answers. She didn't know what was wrong, other than she didn't answer his phone call earlier, who knew what could have swirled in that head of his.

"What's the matter, Jon?" Delia whispered as she flopped down into her bed.

"Nothing."

"Stop lying to me, I know you."

"I'm fine," He huffed and sat up, "What are you doing later?"

"Well, some of the girls invited me out tonight. I don't know. I figured I'd ask you if you minded." Her voice trailed off.

He scoffed, "Why the fuck would you listen to me? I'm not your master or anything."

"That's not what I meant and you know it," She clenched her jaw – she didn't get why he was being such an asshole over a missed phone call.

"Stop lying to yourself, sweetheart." Jon chuckled and took another toke off then rolled joint.

"Why are you being like this?"

"Alright, well I'm going to go pick up another quarter and find Scotty. You just go and have a good time, sweetheart."

"You're such an asshole when you're smoking pot." She shook her head as tears formed in her eyes; this was all going terribly wrong in her eyes. She wanted him to be happy for her, she wanted to be happy for herself. He was never in a good mood until he was extremely high, just being buzzed pissed him off.

"Got that right, pretty girl." He chuckled and soon after that, the line went dead. No 'goodbye's', no 'I love you' nothing.

Delia locked her phone and fell back on her bed, tears falling freely now. Jon knew how to hurt her feelings; he knew that he didn't have to be obscenely mean to her to make her upset. He had a hold over her that she didn't understand, it's like he controlled her and he wasn't even holding the reins anymore. This was her life, this was her education and her future, and she wasn't going to let him control her anymore. If that meant things taking a turn for the worst, then that's the road she'll just have to walk alone. She wasn't afraid of the world anymore.

* * *

The room seemed too small and she regretted going instantly. There were people touching her and Delia had lost sight of the group she had come with. She should have listened to Jon she thought. She looked around the room as the speakers thumped and everyone grinded against another. She had started regretting college altogether, it wasn't really her scene. She was a Florida girl, and sure it was a busy sunny state, but it was a bit calmer than this. Especially around Jon. She longed for him now, to be wrapped protectively in his arms in their bed. She fought back the tears at the thought of their earlier conversation and just how upset he was with her. The strain on their relationship was all her fault and she knew it – she also knew that it wasn't something she could help being two hours away from him.

"Hey pretty girl," The now-familiar voice rang through her head. She cringed at the name he called her, having only been called that by Jon, and turned around to face Adam.

"Hey Adam," Delia smiled sweetly.

He grinned, "What are you doing over here by yourself?"

"There's plenty of people around me, I'm not alone." Delia pulled away from his touch and looked down at her feet. She didn't relate to the fact that she _felt _alone and missed her boyfriend at home.

"Why don't you come over to the booth? We're all sitting over there drinking."

"I'm not old enough to drink in a bar," Delia shook her head.

He rubbed her arms in a sweet way and pushed her softly over towards the table, "I've got you covered. 'S all good."

"No, Adam seriously. I don't drink." Delia said firmly.

He chuckled, "Well alright." He nodded and guided her towards the table, "You don't have to drink, sweet Dels."

"Also," Delia pulled away from his grip, "Can you stop with the nicknames?"

He furrowed his eyebrows and shrugged, "Sure. I'm sorry, Delia. I didn't think it aggravated you so badly."

"It's just that I have a boyfriend back home and I don't want you to say that I mislead you." Delia blushed and shook her head, "I'm sorry for…"

Adam chuckled, "No, no. It's cool! I didn't know you had a uh…a boyfriend. Is he in school, too?"

"He runs his own business," Delia nodded, "He's a mechanic."

Adam nodded knowingly and smirked, "He's a lucky guy to have someone like you."

Delia rolled her eyes and shook her head, "Don't start with that. I'm faithful to him, Adam."

* * *

Jon looked down at the phone on the other end of the couch. He was high off his ass, his eyes squinted and red. He felt calmer than before, everything seemed to slow down. He welcomed the feeling now. He felt good, despite the cloudy vision, but with an office full of smoking workers, it was bound to happen just by the smoke. His mouth was so dry, he needed water or something to get the cottony feeling out. He closed his eyes and breathed deeply, going inside his own head where he didn't have to worry about being cheated on and left for a 'higher educated advanced man'. Right now, Delia could have tried to kill herself and he wouldn't care. He was high as a kite.

In the distance, he heard his cell phone ring. He looked down at the caller I.D and smirked as it said the last name he wanted to see but he flipped it up and began talking anyway, "You just have the nerve don't you sweetheart?"

"I called to tell you goodnight," Delia said softly.

He smirked, "Night pretty girl."

She broke her walls down in an instant after hearing that name, "I miss you Jon. I miss you so much. I want to come home. I don't like it here."

"Like hell you are!" He chuckled, "I think you'd be insane to leave that college. You worked hard to get there. Make me proud."

"How am I going to make you proud when you don't even trust me?"

He huffed a long heavy sigh, "I trust _you _Delia. I don't trust those other boys around you."

* * *

Jon's Jealous, Delia has a school boy toy...when will things straighten out for them? *sigh*


	3. Chapter 3: I'm a Monster

Delia's eyes cracked open thirty minutes before the alarm clock went off. She blinked a few times and rolled over on her stomach, smiling at the remains of her dream playing through her mind. She dreamed of Jon, seeing as it had been almost three weeks since she had last seen him and phone calls offered no sexual gratification to the either of them. She ached for him, in more ways than one. Countless nights she had dreams about him in his bedroom, having his way with her in whatever place he pleased – she never cared as long as it was him filling her up. She remembered the first 'wet' dream she had, it felt so weird and real. She remembers waking up and reaching for him only to fall off of the twin sized bed. That was a huge wake up call.

But the need of release was prominent that morning, the ache and wetness between her legs throbbed her to do something she's never done before. She picked up her phone, squinting as the bright light blinded her, and quickly texted Jon knowing that he was up and getting ready for work.

**_Hey babe, quick skype?_**

She flipped the top of her laptop open and quickly signed into the video chat and waited. Smiling, she saw that he had signed in just after her and a split second after that, she got the invitation to join him. She smiled as she saw the sleepy face of him come up on her screen, the one she'd missed waking up to so much. He yawned and cuddled the pillow further, his blue eyes now wider as he took in her smiling face.

"What are you so smiley about?" He said softly, plugging a pair of headphones into the side.

She shrugged and laid back on her side, "I had a pretty pleasant dream."

He took in the fact that she didn't have any makeup on and was just getting woken up herself. She looked gorgeous like this, like he loved seeing her, she was beautiful. This felt right, it felt normal to see her like this. Shit, he just thought it felt good to see her without being rushed. He didn't have any hatred built up in him, he wasn't upset about anything when he looked at her. It seemed as that all faded away as soon as she smiled at him.

He smirked, "Tell me about that dream of yours."

And so she did, telling him every last detail of the sex filled dream. How he had her pinned to the head-board, torturing and tickling her body in the sweetest way he knew how. Even through the webcam, he could see the need in her eyes as she bit her lip recalling her dream of him. Turns out, she had dreamed of a more dominant side of him that he had yet to fully let her see – he didn't want to scare her and he knew she wasn't a very experienced girl although she rode like she was…

"Jon," Delia cleared her throat, "I was thinking maybe…we…could ya know."

He arched an eyebrow and grinned – knowing exactly what she was getting at, but wasn't going to give her the satisfaction, "Know what babe?"

"Maybe we could watch each other..or something…"

"You want to watch me jack off…?"

Her cheeks burned red as she bit her bottom lip and nodded. Jon had to admit hearing her tell him about her dream had evoked something in him and he got a sickly satisfaction of knowing she needed him just as much through sexual things, too. "Yeah."

Jon looked back at the door to make sure his bedroom was closed off before looking back at the screen to see she had already discarded herself of her shirt and was sitting back against the head-board, her legs spread wide but what he longed to taste still hidden behind a pair of red panties. He felt himself harden further as her hands explored her own body, squeezing at her own chest and then dragging her nails down her stomach. He missed this and even though she was two hours away, it felt like she was in front of him.

He could still taste her, most of the times he felt like it was etched in his mouth. He'd become addicted to her and he wasn't afraid to tell anyone that, it's like he needed her. It probably wasn't healthy but he wasn't trying to do anything to stop it, it's like she made all the bad things disappear. She was a shield from everything that went wrong in his life.

Jon watched with needy eyes as her hands traveled further down her body, down the top of her thighs and change direction at her kneecaps, moving them back up the inside of her legs. He growled as he watched her hands dip down the front of the red cotton laces and tease herself, sliding a finger over her folds.

"Fucking tease," Jon scoffed and heard her chuckle as he moved to mirror her place, bringing the laptop up into his lap as he leaned back against the headboard.

"At least you can see some skin," she grinned and continued to stroke herself from the inside of the confining underwear.

He took the hint behind her statement and sat there for a few minutes, contemplating how many minutes he had until Scotty was up for the morning. He had about thirty minutes. He slid the boxers down off of his hips as he watched her do the same, her legs parting open so he could see all of her.

He watched as she slowly circled her hood with two fingers, biting her lip and staring straight into the camera. "I said I wanted to watch you jack off…that means cock, too babe."

He sighed and sat the webcam down, his hand coming up to grip his hard member tightly in his own hand. He bit his bottom lip as he watched her slowly ease two fingers into herself and her thumb come up to play around her clit. He noticed her other hand accompanied her mouth, two fingers shoved passed her lips just like he always done to her. Some odd reason, he took pride in watching her suck her fingers just like he had shown her to do the very first time.

He reached for a bottle of lotion but found something else instead. He picked up a bottle of oil, it wasn't very often he searched through the top drawer of his night stand but he knew he hadn't put it there. He heard her chuckle as he dangled the tube of oil in front her the camera for her to see with a knowing smirk.

"I put it there before I left," She giggled, "I've had this planned for a while."

"I can see that," He smirked and watched as she went back to caressing her body. He popped the top and filled his palm with a generous amount of the slick substance, cupping his hand to drizzle it over the tip of himself. The hard cock just proved how much he needed her, just listening to her fantasy had made him this hard.

She watched as he laid further back against the headboard, now being able to see his face as well as his cock stuffed hand. She began rubbing herself, one hand working her clit and the other shoving fingers deep into her glistening sex. For the longest part, they just watched each other getting themselves off. She had the volume turned up fully, she could hear the slicking sound of his hand moving around himself and every soft noise he gave off.

She began moaning his name, telling him she needed to hear his voice, so he gave in. "I can feel you against my tongue still, just how good you taste. I need you, Delia. I need you now more than ever. It feels so good to be buried inside of you, you're so tight around me. You feel so good…so good."

They both let out a shaky breath as she listened further into his deep rugged voice booming through the pair of ear-phones mixing with the sound of him getting himself off. She tried to refocus, tried to set her mind straight and draw this out a little longer but as soon as he started talking she was melting. His voice was raw and guttural, his moans even more so. She sat up a little and watched as he squeezed himself around his head, his hips bucking up into his hand.

"You're the only one who has seen me like this, who will ever get to see me like this, no one will ever have…m-me like this. Oh fuck, Jon. I love when your tasting me, getting me even wetter to fuck me." She shuddered and arched her back from the bed to grind into her fingers more.

"Fucking right I am," He growled and quickened his strokes as he watched her unhinged from the world surrounding her, knowing that she was headed towards that few seconds of oblivion. "You're so wet for me, aren't you pretty girl?"

"Fuck yes," She whimpered, thrusting her hips up so that she rubbed against her clit, "So fucking wet for you. Only for you, Jon."

He watched silently as her orgasm tore through her, watching as she cringed and cried out. She rubbed herself through it all, her body jerking and she called his name out multiple times. Just watching her got him off, his release spurting out of him as he squeezed at his head. He came hard but it was obvious she was the beneficiary of this mainly as she laid there unable to move for a few minutes.

Jon couldn't take looking at her anymore, it was just a reminder that she wasn't really there. He slammed the top of the laptop down and shoved it towards the edge of the bed. He wiped his hands of himself against the bed sheets and took a huge breath. He couldn't do this anymore. It hurt not being able to see and feel her. The skype call only made it worse because he knew when he reached for her, she wouldn't be there and he'd only be grabbing air.

He wasn't worthy of seeing her like that anymore.

His phone buzzed and he read the text from her, **_What the fuck? Why are you so mad at me?_**

Delia didn't know what had just happened. All she saw was the sad look in his eyes as he stared at her just before cutting the call off without a goodbye. That stung her really badly, like he just used her to get himself off. Maybe that's what he thought she was doing and it was far from the truth. Sure, she had called him because she was horny but she wanted that to be an intimate experience for the two of them. He didn't even answer her text back but she knew he had read it – it showed her at the bottom of her screen. It hurt. It hurt really, really badly.

* * *

"It's like he shut down, mom. I don't know what to do." Delia cried into the phone at her lunch break. She had told her everything, even about the skype call earlier this morning.

Her mother sighed into the phone, "You get to come home in two weeks. Maybe that will help the two of you. You never know what's going through his mind, sweetheart. Guys are very, very hard to understand. It could be nothing other than the fact that he's missing you."

"If he missed me, why is he being such an ass?"

"It's because all guys are asses, sweetheart. You know how to deal with him during his worst times. You have to trust yourself to be able to do that. Don't let him push you away, Delia. He's going to push your buttons to try to see how far he can get under your skin. Don't let him win that, Delia."

"It's like he doesn't even car that I love him anymore," She was now sobbing with her head laying on her arm; everyone was looking at her like she was insane. Maybe she was, she couldn't tell anymore, "I love him so much mom."

"I know you do, sweetie. I know he loves you just as much."

"Why doesn't he see it, then?"

"Some men are just blind."

* * *

"So you watched her cum and then you hung the call up?" Scotty asked in disbelief.

Jon nodded and his cheeks reddened, "Yeah…"

"What the fuck man? I thought you loved this bitch?"

Jon glared at him, "Call her a bitch one more time and I swear to god I'll fucking end you."

Scotty's eyes widened as he shook his head, "I didn't mean it like that!"

Jon let a pent-up sigh out and nodded, "I did love her…I still do love her…I just don't know how to deal without her…"

"My man," Scotty patted his shoulder, "Seems to me like you're in love with her. We all know how you get when you're in love with someone. You know it, too. Don't fuck it up, man."

Jon thought back to her. Her name was Christina, she was the first girl he was ever actually sexually intimate with. He had gotten attached to her, but Christina wasn't a very smart girl and had gotten caught up in a world of trouble with drugs. He had to get away from that life fast, it wasn't for him.

* * *

Delia immersed herself into the small group of friends she had acquired since getting to the school that night. She didn't want to think of how much Jon had embarrassed her. And then she felt stupid for being embarrassed by him. It wasn't like he was going to show everyone what they done or tell anyone. She just couldn't believe, after sharing that intimate moment with him, he just abruptly slapped the laptop closed. He didn't respond to her text messages; he didn't answer the one phone call. It felt like he was ignoring her. She didn't want to think about what must have went through his mind. Maybe he thought she was a whore. Maybe that's what she really was. It wasn't lady like to call your boyfriend over the internet and expose yourself like that. She wasn't going to do it ever again, she knew that for sure.

"What's up with you, Delia?" Adam asked, scooting over in the booth beside of her in the small coffee shop.

Delia shrugged, "Just thinking."

"Humor me, I'm very good at listening." Adam smiled and tapped the table in a somewhat rhythmically pattern.

"Honestly, I'm fine." She nodded, "Whats up?"

"Just going over some chemistry work," He shrugged, "What about you?"

Delia shook her head slowly as the tears threatened to fall again. She didn't know why she was so emotional, but seeing the look in his eyes jarred something deep inside of her. She felt like she needed to go home and make it up to him, that maybe this could all be settled without any major conflict and she'd have her happy relationship back.

They were so happy, she was content with her relationship. She knew now that he didn't trust her, he had to have some sort of obscene idea floating around in his head.

The rest of the day seemed like a blur to her and she spent it mostly with the group of friends. She seemed to fit in with them pretty well, they had the same interests and same religion, all of them came from a religious house-hold. They were playing cards in the floor of the girl named Amy's dorm. She was sitting beside of Adam and noticed he kept nudging her, rubbing his elbow against her upper arms. She wasn't comfortable with him touching her, she was used to it being Jon touching her, and Adam's touch felt somewhat weird. It made her feel appreciated but only in the friendly way. She went along with his jokes and ended up having a really good time, the thoughts of Jon drifting far from her mind.

They only came back when she was alone in the dorm room that night; her roommate was gone out with her boyfriend. She was left alone with her thoughts of him. She missed the way he smiled at her, the way he looked lovingly at her. She missed him in all sense of the word. His kisses. Being wrapped in his arms. She didn't want college anymore.

Her phone's ringtone sliced through the quiet room and she smiled through her teary-eyes as she saw it was Jon. "Hello?"

He breathed heavily into the phone and closed his eyes, "Delia…"

"Hey."

"Hey."

There was a few minutes of painfully awkward silence. He could hear her soft sniffles and knew she had cried. She laid there and listened to the sound of him breathing, all of a sudden too shy to talk. She didn't know what to say, what to talk about, or if she'd be pushing some sort of button on him that sent him off again.

"Jon, what's happening to us?" She whispered softly, wiping her tears away.

He clicked his tongue and took a deep breath, "I have no fucking idea, D."

Out of nowhere, she heard what sounded like a door open and music flooded around him. She heard a woman's voice trail out, "Moxley! You want this lap dance or what?"

Her heart hurt even more, it pounded in her chest. That wasn't what she heard, it couldn't be. Where was he? Who was that girl? Questions swarmed her mind and she was scared to ask them. She didn't want to know. She didn't want to talk to him anymore. She had to go, she couldn't let him hear her cry. She wouldn't give him the satisfaction of knowing just how much he hurt her.

Jon heard the line go dead and glared at the intruding girl. Who knows what Delia was thinking now, and what she thought of him. She probably thought he was a monster. Maybe he was. Maybe he was being selfish with her, he couldn't keep her from having a good time. College was her last few years of freedom. Maybe its best she thought he was a monster. Maybe she'd leave him. He couldn't force himself to leave her, he couldn't force himself to do anything else but humiliate her and himself. Jon knew it wasn't right. None of this was right. And he didn't know how he was going to fix it.

* * *

_**Whew...**_


	4. Chapter 4: Homeor something like it

As the line went dead, Jon's heart beat rapidly in his chest. Who knew what she thought of him now. It wasn't what it sounded like, not at all. Jon was in the confines of his bedroom and Scotty's girlfriend had stepped in to tease him. He had tried calling her back continuously that night but she wouldn't answer her phone. He sat up the entire night cursing himself for being such a stupid cunt. Around seven that morning, she finally answered her phone.

"What do you want, Jon? You want to make me feel even worse about myself? You want to laugh in my face, now? Go ahead and humiliate me some more. Did you enjoy your fucking whore dancing all over you, Jon?" Her rugged voice yelled at him.

He wasn't shocked at her tone of voice, he would be worried if she was calm when talking to him after what she had heard. "Delia it's not like that. I haven't left the house all night. I left work and when I came home, Scotty's girlfriend was over here and they were drinking. I promise, D. It's not what you think."

"Whatever, Jon. I gotta go. I got to get ready for school." Her voice cracked, "Jon…do you still love me?"

"Why would you ask me that?" Jon scoffed, "Of fucking course I still love you. I'll always love you."

* * *

He thought about it all the way to pick her up. Even thought it had been a couple of weeks since it all happened, and they managed to get over it all, their relationship was still patchy. Phone calls were short. Skype calls didn't happen anymore between them. She had put all her focus into classes and her new group of friends and he didn't blame her – he wanted her to do well. They had made a promise to the other that he would be the one to pick her up for her Christmas break. And he kept his promise, which was why he was driving the two-hour drive to get her.

Delia stood at the edge of the dorm room entrance most of the day. She was so excited to get to see him. Regardless of the disconnection between the two of them she still loved him deeply. She wanted nothing more than to taste his kisses again, be wrapped in his arms in a tight embrace. She could put away their differences for a few days and just focus on being with him. She needed him to make any of the doubts go away, to clear her head a bit. She just needed him.

It was only a few hours before she could hear his car. The sound reached her before the sight of the Chevy Impala came to her. She smiled as she remembered the first time she rode with him and the soft kiss that took place in the backseat. He parked the car in front of her and warily got out. This wasn't his scene, he was here for her though, and he felt his heart beat a little faster when the view of her came into his eyes.

She bolted to him as soon as he was standing and wrapped her arms around him tightly, tears stinging her eyes. This was what she had wanted ever since she left. He was here, she could feel him, she could touch him, and she could smell him. He always smelt so good to her. She'd found herself craving the scent of cigarette smoke and motor oil when she missed him the most. A few of her friends had transcended from the dormitories and stood watching them with smiles on their faces. She'd told a few of them about him and how much she loved him, there were days she couldn't seem to stop talking about him even when they were mad at the other.

She looked up at him and had a kiss planted on her waiting lips, whimpering softly at her first taste of him in six weeks. His head tilted, tongues came into play, and he held her tighter than he probably should have but she didn't seem to mind. Her fingers tangled and tugged short auburn hair and she swallowed his moan. She couldn't get enough of him. Her face flushed, tears stung harder and rolled down her face and onto his. She held onto him tighter, pulling him closer down to her.

He broke the kiss as they both panted against each other, licking the remains off of their lips. She buried her face in his neck and sighed as they stood there for a few minutes. Neither of them talked. She was hugging him the tightest she ever had, he took notice that she was trying really hard not to cry. He found it weird that he didn't have any of those feelings he thought he would have; he wasn't embarrassed, he wasn't shy, it felt like it picked right back up where they physically left off. Maybe that was a good thing. Maybe they really did need each other.

"Hi." Delia whispered against his chest.

"Hey yourself." He whispered against the crown of her head.

She felt clingy towards him and she didn't mean too, but she couldn't believe he was really here. In her own mind, she thought maybe he was lying through texts when he said he was on his way and he'd leave her there. She probably deserved it the way she'd acted towards him. It was cold outside and his body was warmness seeped into her skin it felt like, he felt so good.

"C'mon." Delia said with a smile on her face.

He furrowed his brow and pursed his lips, "Where?"

"I want to show you off," She gripped his hand tightly and tugged him towards the group of people he had noticed was watching them.

He groaned and let her lead the way, he wasn't comfortable around new people like this but he'd deal with it. In a few minutes, he'd have her to himself again. He was quiet the entire time they stood with the group of friends, he was much taller than everyone and it just felt awkward.

"So, you like a mime or something?" The blond-headed boy shoved at his arm gently, causing Jon's focus to go off of what Delia was saying.

"No?" Jon huffed.

"Then whats up, man?"

"Nothing." With one look at the man fully, Jon knew something wasn't right with him. Ego's didn't clash there, personalities came out heavily and he could see the jealous look Adam gave their hands that were interlocked tightly against Delia's side. Adam was jealous of him and he didn't really know why but he knew he couldn't trust him.

"So you have your own shop? You like work on cars and stuff?" Adam asked, Jon could hear the annoyance in his voice. It actually humored Jon.

"Yeah, motorcycles, cars, trucks, anything of that sort." Jon nodded, squeezing Delia's hand a little tighter visibly just to see how much it made Adam squirm or if it would. It did.

"Yeah well that's cool I guess." Adam nodded and pushed his hands in his front pockets, "So how do you know Dels?"

"Dels?" Jon arched an eyebrow and looked at him fully.

"Your girlfriend?" Adam asked sarcastically.

"No shit," Jon laughed, "Sort of from school."

After a few minutes of listening to the girls talking, Adam huffed loudly and looked over at the couple. He wondered why Delia loved him, or even why she was with him. Delia didn't deserve a scum looking boy dressed in a work-shirt and a black tank top underneath it. She deserved a man dressed in the finest suits, maybe Armani and one who is able to take her out to nice dinners. Jon didn't look like he could give half of that, although he drove up in a nice muscle car. He then realized that Jon was the owner of a mechanic shop and he probably did have money. That's how he kept Delia, Adam thought. Delia was a money-girl.

_Well if that's all she wants, _Adam thought to himself, _Then it shouldn't be hard to win her over._

Delia wrapped her arm around Jon's waist and leaned against his chest, unaware of the jealousy brewing between the two men beside of her. She was lost in conversation with the two girls who were talking about holiday dresses and family traditions. She looked up at Jon and was rewarded with his searing gaze. It felt like a jolt running through her body, she craved him almost. She had to keep her control. Sex was good with him, it really was, but she didn't want to be humiliated like she was during the Skype call.

"Well, Sweet Dels, I think we all are going to let you go." Adam spoke up, cutting the girls conversation off.

"Oh," Delia said softly and nodded thoughtfully, "I didn't realize I was keeping you from anything."

"You're not at all, I just think it's time to let you two get on your way. They're calling for snow and you two need to be safe." Adam smiled.

"Yeah, I guess you're right. Ready, Jon?"

Jon nodded and helped her back her things into the back of his car. They were soon on their way back home, she could feel the tension grow just a bit. Her heart pounded in her chest so loud, her palms were sweaty, and it sort of gave her this odd feeling. Why was he doing this to her? This wasn't normal, the quietness wasn't them. Six weeks apart had destroyed them, and she knew that, but it wasn't all her fault. She could tell he was in a dark place, somewhere deep in his own head, and she had no idea of how to pull him out of it.

"You want anything to eat?" Jon offered, quickly glancing over to her sitting body.

She shrugged, "A little bit."

He nodded and turned the radio back up, the bass of the old ninety's song rattling the doors slightly. She smiled, maybe he wasn't in the dark place after all. He seemed normal in her presence. They were just trying to work out the awkwardness of their separation. That's all it had to be, right?

* * *

They ended up in the same booth of the waffle house they sat in only a few months ago, this time they were sitting close together and there wasn't the table separating them. She leaned into his chest, under his arm that he had wrapped tightly around her. She held the front of his t-shirt as they talked about her first semester of college.

"So," He grinned, "How's the whole thing going?"

She nodded and nuzzled her cheek against his chest, "It's going good really. Just…I hate that it's so far away from home, ya know? There's nights that I miss my home, ya know? Nights that I miss laying beside of you…" Her voice trailed off as he took that in. It felt good to know what she still wanted and dreamt of being beside of him as much as he dreamed of her.

"So Adam seems to be pretty keen on you," Jon joked but the joke stung her deep. She heard the crack of jealousy in his voice.

She shrugged, "He's a friend Jon."

"No, he's crushing."

"He is not," She snapped, "Why are you being so insecure?"

"I'm not being insecure; I'm trying to joke around with you. Goddamn, Delia you're too uptight." Jon shook his head and removed his arm from around her.

"Oh, I'm too uptight?" Delia laughed sarcastically, "Yeah. Real fucking honest, aren't you there bud?"

Jon rolled his eyes and moved so that he was out of the booth, "I'm not dealing with you now. You want to be a bitch? Fine, be a fucking bitch. But do me a favor, sweetheart and keep the bitch in here. Come out to the car when you've snapped back into reality."

She watched as he walked away from the table and out the front glass doors. She sulked in her seat for a few minutes before leaving after him, stomping her feet as she walked. He wasn't going to get by with calling her a bitch, no one got away with calling her a bitch without knowing exactly what she was capable of.

"HEY!" She screamed at him in the parking lot, watching as he rolled his eyes and leaned up against the car.

"I'm not talking to you if you're just going to be an unreasonable brat. I don't have time for the ungrateful assholes of the world."

"Oh, so now I'm a bitch _and_ an asshole? You're one to talk, buddy!" She poked his chest, "You are the one who is jealous of Adam and you have NOTHING to be jealous of."

She took in his wide stance. His chin pushed out towards her, his arms crossed tightly over his chest, he leaned back against the car and pointed his hips out towards her, his shoulders pressed backwards. He looked powerful, fuck – he was powerful. She knew anyone passing by them knew this was true, he showed dominance. He wasn't someone to fuck with. His jaw ticked, his hair hung down in his blue eyes, and under his closed lips she could see his tongue raking out over his teeth. She knew then he wasn't jealous of anyone, he knew she was his, and he had to just show it to the Adam.

Jon didn't know why he was so pissed off, she knew how to push his buttons though, and she made sure she did. He loved her. He loved her so much. But he didn't know just how much longer he could deal with this constant arguing. It hurt, he'd argued with everyone he seemed to care the most about in his life. It's like after a few months of him, everyone got tired or realized he wasn't good enough for them and they moved on. He didn't blame them, not a lot of people knew how to deal with an abused bastard kid from the harsh streets of Cincinnati. He didn't even know how to deal with himself half the time.

"I don't have a fucking thing to be jealous of, I know, because he knows now that I'm not some figment of your imagination. So are you going to go in there and eat or are you going to get in the car?" Jon shrugged his shoulders as he lit his cigarette, a shiver ran through his raged body.

"Take me to my mothers," She grumbled and slammed the car door.

He quickly joined her in the car and grumbled to himself, "My fucking pleasure."

* * *

_**This seems to be crumbling...**_


	5. Chapter 5: Friendsor something like it

Delia always loved Christmas time. Her family was around, the house was warm and presents were wrapped underneath the tree. And she got to see her brother. But all the joy had faded from her, her heart was broken when Jon let her off at her mother's house the day before. He didn't even say goodbye and he didn't help her get her bags out of his trunk, not that she expected him to, but he said nothing to her the rest of the way home. Delia was now curled up on her mother's living room couch in the quiet room by herself and a nice warm cup of apple cider that she sipped at slowly. Her mother had, unbeknownst to Delia, spiked it slightly to help her sleep tonight.

"What's up, sis?" Ryder, her brother, came in and flopped down on the other couch next to the one Delia occupied.

Delia shook her head and shrugged slightly, "Nothing really. Just thinking."

"You still upset over him?" Ryder pursed his lips as his meaty fingers played with the hem of his shirt.

Tears brimmed her eyes as she nodded, "Yeah." But she couldn't let them fall; crying over Jon just let him win, "Yeah. I am."

"Hey, it's okay to cry." Ryder said as he moved closer to his sister on the other couch, "Want me to kick his ass, sis?"

She grinned sadly, "No. No don't do that. Don't hurt him."

Ryder was also in college, but he was going out for football with a major in business. Ryder was a big three-hundred pounder with the stance of six-foot four, two inches taller than Jon and a lot beefier than the lanky boy. Ryder was two years older than Delia and had a knack for being extremely protective over her, with her being smaller and younger, it just came naturally.

"So, what did he do?" Ryder asked politely, moving to pull his sister into his lap as she sobbed.

"He's acted so weird lately," She cried, "Just doesn't seem right. It feels like that I'm doing wrong by going to school and furthering my education. Like I'm the one in the wrong. He won't talk to me and tell me what's wrong. He just continues to make sarcastic remarks and gets pissed off when I start to talk back to him."

"Then maybe you should leave him in the past." Ryder shrugged, "He isn't good enough for you."

"He is good enough for me. He's perfect, Ry. But I just can't see us continuing to work out if he doesn't stop acting like a complete dumbass."

"Then scare it into him." Ryder shrugged, "The best way to know if a man wants you or not is to scare him. Threaten to leave him. I know it works for me."

"But you and Jon are very, verrrryyyy different people. Jon isn't the type of man to wait around on a girl. Not even me." Delia said softly, "And it hurts. But if we aren't in a healthy relationship then I can't keep it. I can't juggle a stressful relationship and school. I can't do it. Especially when he's calling me names. I just can't."

Intrigued, Ryder pushed on with his questions, "Yeah? Calling you names? Like what?"

Delia shrugged, "Just once but he called me a bitch and told me I was acting ignorant."

* * *

Jon thought all night about how he acted towards Delia. He hated himself for being so hateful towards her, maybe this was all his fault. He had to make something better, he didn't know how to do it, and he felt stupid for sitting behind the steering wheel of his car so early in the morning. He knew that if he wanted to keep her now he'd have to fight for her.

When he arrived at the brick house, he saw a large man sitting on the front steps. It was too young to be her father and at first, he feared he had really lost Delia. Then he remembered her talking about having an older brother that came home for the holidays and hope set in. Surely she couldn't have moved on that quickly, right? It took everything Jon had not to drive away but he clung tightly onto hope and got out of his car, leaving the keys in the ignition.

As he approached the front porch, the bigger man looked up at him from his phone and smirked, "You Jon?"

He nodded, "Yeah. And you are?"

"Delia's brother," Ryder stood up and slightly towered over Jon a bit, "I'm Ryder."

"Cool," Jon nodded, "She up?"

"I don't think you need to be talking to her, not today. You put your 'bitch' in enough emotional pain yesterday. You need to get back into your car and leave."

Jon scoffed, "You need to get ahold of yourself dude. I don't fucking listen to others, and it's something you're going to learn quick, fast, and in a hurry. Now, do I have to ring the doorbell and wake everyone up or are you going to go get her for me?"

"Delia's asleep and you need to learn some fucking respect." Ryder pointed a finger in Jon's face and scowled, "Especially when it comes to my sister. I will fuck you up."

"Yeah," Jon laughed sarcastically, "I'd love to see you try, big guy. You're going to learn what it feels like to have a size eleven planted snuggly up your ass if you even lay a finger on me, bitch."

The shouting match continued until it woke Delia up. She groaned and rolled over in her bed, blinking against the sunlight. The sad, empty feeling in her heart set in almost immediately. She missed Jon. She could hear Ryder shouting downstairs at someone, calling whoever all sorts of names. She rolled her eyes and got out of bed, pulling her clothes on for the day.

She looked out her bedroom window and her heart fell as she saw the black Impala sitting out in front of her hours. Immediately, she threw her hairbrush down and took off running down the stairs. She threw the door open just in time to see Ryder's fist punching straight into Jon's mouth and ran even faster to get in between the two of them. They both backed off of each other when she got in between the two of them and clutched to Jon.

"Ryder what the fuck do you think you're doing?" She snapped, looking at the bloody nose and busted lip of Jon and then over to the face of Ryder who was also bloodied, "What the fuck is wrong with you two?"

"All I done was came over here to talk and then he's going to start saying shit about teaching me respect. Fuck you, man." Jon said, wiping the back of his hand across his mouth and then spitting a large amount of blood out, "How about people need to learn to stay out of our relationship?"

"Maybe you need to learn how to deal with relationships," Ryder retorted and rolled his eyes, "You're fucking with the wrong girl, Jon."

"And you still don't know who you're fucking with," Jon shot back.

Delia threw her hands up in both of their faces, "Both of you shut the fuck up. Ryder, go back in the house."

"You don't tell me what to do, Delia." Ryder scoffed.

"Ryder just please go in the house," Delia pleaded, knowing that Jon was still pretty pissed and she knew that Jon could take Ryder with ease, "Just listen to me. I'll be okay. Just go."

Ryder gave a long heated stare at Jon, who returned it, before turning around and slamming the front door. Delia let out a deep sigh and took a few steps away from Jon and sat down on the edge of the tall porch, shaking her head as she did. No matter how much she was pissed at him, Jon didn't deserve to be punched. Neither of them did.

"Why are you here?" Delia asked softly, crossing her arms over her chest.

He shrugged, "Figured you'd like to talk. I didn't expect to get my ass beat."

"Let me see your lip, it looks pretty bad." Delia said, watching as he walked over to stand in front of her, bending down at little. She ran her thumb softly over his puffy bottom lip, it had already turned a soft purple, and winced at the split. He whimpered slightly and placed his hands beside of her on the porch, bending down further. Catching her off guard, he pressed his lips down to hers. She was a little hesitant to kiss him back at first but slowly gave into him, yielding the entrance as his tongue swept out over her lips.

The soft metallic taste of his bloody lip mixed with his taste almost made her weak and she wrapped her arms around his waist, clawing to get him closer. They both swallowed a moan and she tore away from him, putting her hands on his chest to push him back a little. "Why are you here?"

"Don't push me away, Delia." He mumbled as he closed the space between them, "Please don't push me away baby."

"You hurt me, Jon. You know that?" She bit back her tears.

"I know I did," He shook his head slightly, "But Delia, you aren't innocent here."

"What do you want to talk about?" She crossed her arms and looked down at them, she couldn't even look at him.

"Lets go somewhere," He caught the image of her brother looming from inside the bay window, "Where we have some privacy."

"Jon I-"

"Please," He stroked her face, "I can't lose you, Delia. I thought I done that already. It's Christmas, and I want to spend some time with you, alright?"

She bit her bottom lip and nodded, "Yeah. Okay. Let me go get my coat."

* * *

They ended up in the old rundown park. Since it was so cold, not a lot of people were out, and they got the swings to themselves. The cold hard ground still had ice on it, and the dead grass crunched beneath her shoes as she slowly started to push herself. A heavy sigh left her lips and she watched the white puff of breath leave her mouth and dissolve into the air. She pulled her coat tighter around her and shuddered slightly, watching as he sat down in the swing beside of her.

He picked at the rusted seat that poked out between his legs, pulling the old painting off of it and flicking it towards the mulch covered ground before figuring she was waiting on him to start talking. He could feel her eyes on him, watching as he slowly pushed himself with his feet. "You're too good for me, Delia."

"Don't start with that, Jon." She shook her head and sighed, "We both know that's completely asinine."

"It isn't asinine, Delia. It's the truth!" He shrugged, "I've never been good enough for you. Everyone knows it. I can see it when they look at us together. Florida preacher's daughters don't love Cincinnati scum. It's not even logical."

"Who gives a fuck what's logical, Jon?" Delia scratched her head in irritation, "I don't even want to think logical. I'm so sick and tired of being normal, of being the 'good girl' in town. Who gives a fuck if everyone thinks we aren't going to work out? Who gives a _flying _fuck what we do in our own time? I know there's something else that you want to say and you're not saying it. I know that look, Jon. You wanted to talk, so talk."

He sighed and stood up off the swing, pacing in front of her. Something was really bugging him, she could tell by the way he fidgeted with his hands – he'd scratch the back of his neck, bite at his nails, and rub his hands together. He was making her nervous and before she could say anything, he was walking away from her.

She was quick on his heels, her skirt almost making her trip a few times but she managed to get her balance back, and cornered him against a larger oak tree, "Stop fucking walking away!"

He sunk down against the tree and shook his head, "I'm losing you, Delia. I know I am. I can feel it. We can smooth things over but you're going to leave soon again and go back to college and you're…you're going to fall into his arms, I know you are Delia, and it fucking kills me."

She slumped down over him, straddling his hips as she reached for his face, "Jon what the fuck are you talking about?"

"Don't sugarcoat it," he swallowed pretty loudly, " You like Adam. You have feelings for him. I'm not stupid, Delia. I know that look, that little glint in your eye. I used to see it all the time. Now I just see…annoyance when you look at me. It's normal, I get it all the time, and it just hurts coming from you…really badly."

"I'm not annoyed with you, Jon. You'd never annoy me. I just have a lot on my plate now. Adam and I are friends, Jon. We help each other study; we're going for the same degree. He wants to be a pediatrician, too. And yeah, I'm not going to lie, he's attractive, but Jon I'm with you. I'm your girlfriend. I don't mean to hurt you, and I don't mean to look annoyed with you, I love you." She kissed him sweetly, "but if you can't deal with me going away to college then maybe we just need to take a break."

He squeezed his eyes closed, trying to control every emotion he was feeling at the moment. Deep down, he knew it was what would probably work. He couldn't give up his reign on her. She was his, and he'd kill anyone who dared touch her, even if they were 'just friends'. He tried to tell himself that this wasn't the end of them, this relationship would continue when it felt right and maybe they could pick up where they left off when they were happy. He had to have her one last time, and maybe sex should be the least from his mind, but she felt so good sitting on his lap and every little movement she made brought him closer to losing all sense of control.

"If we're going to be just friends," She whispered as she moved her hips over his lap slowly feeling the clear bulge straining against the front of his pants, "Fuck me one last time before we take a break?"

He swallowed the lump in his throat and nodded, "Yeah. Okay."

She smiled sadly and moved from him, the two of them making quick back to his car that was parked in the shadier parts of the parking lot. They were the only ones there, and it wasn't like they would get caught, so he figured the backseat would be good enough. He watched as she crawled into his lap and they both fought to get their jackets off. Her long skirt fell over the both of them as he watched her tug her shirt off, his hands running up the sides of her and up to cup her breast. Even with slight tears welling into her eyes, she looked so damn beautiful on top of him as she arched into his touch.

She reached down between them, quickly unzipping his pants and pulling his dick out, running her hands over the hard length as her lips crashed down onto his. He felt warm and heavy in her hands, he felt right almost, like she should be the only one touching him like this.

"Shit," He grumbled, "I…I don't have any-"

"Ssshh," She whispered and kissed him again, "I'm still on the pill."

He nodded and bunched the lengthy orange skirt up to watch as she position and then slid down around him. They both groaned at the intrusion, her hips moving slowly against his. He clung to her, holding her body the tightest he ever had to him. He didn't want this to end and she didn't either. His fingers rubbed at the nape of her neck as he closed his eyes and held out as long as he could.

"I love you, and you don't have to love me back, I'm used to that, but you'll always have my heart." He whispered, completely breaking down as he clutched to her tighter. He knew the saying 'fucking with feelings' rung true now, don't have sex if you still love them, because this was the most satisfying painful sex he'd ever had.

He felt like he had more invested in this relationship than she did.

* * *

_**You think Jon's feelings are right?...could this possibly be the ending of them?  
Things will start to pick up pace, we'll start jumping around a little bit. Still a lot left to cover, I have a lot planned for these two. But don't think it's going to get any better any time soon...Review! **_


	6. Chapter 6: Cigarette Smoke and Motor Oil

It had been three days since Delia and Jon had decided to try the friendliness of their relationship. Her mother knew Jon didn't have anywhere to go on Christmas, and being the good-natured person she genuinely was, she had invited him over for their family dinner. He had practically been there every day before that with Delia, and she hated the strain they were currently going through. She liked Jon, and knew how much Delia felt about him, so she invited him over anyway.

Jon and Delia, however, were up in her bathroom, worrying themselves sick. You see, Delia's period was late and they had snuck a pregnancy test into her room. Delia looked over at him. He pulled the jacket tighter around him. She could see the worry in his face that she was feeling deep in her bones. This couldn't happen this soon. They were waiting on the timer to go off and when it did, it jarred them all the way to their fibers it felt like.

They looked at each other and she nodded towards him, signaling that she wanted him to read over the test. He grabbed the piece of plastic and the directions, studying the piece of paper and sighing deeply. She watched as his eyes darted back and forth between the test and the paper. "Negative."

"Are you sure?"

He nodded and chewed on the corner of his lip. "Yep."

Relief washed over her as he sat down beside her on the edge of the tub. He kissed the top of her head as he tried to calm her down, rubbing her back softly. "It's okay. Our life isn't ruined." He smiled. "It's all alright, babe."

There was no doubt she was scared. She tried hard to calm herself down as she leaned against him for support. She wasn't pregnant. She could calm down now. Her body wasn't being invaded, and that was a good thing. She looked up at him through tears and felt him softly wiping the falling drops off of her face. "There's no need to be scared, pretty girl. It's false. Okay? It's Christmas. Stop crying, babe."

She smiled and nodded, taking a long deep breath before forcefully exhaling it and standing up. She washed her face in the sink and reapplied her makeup, never once looking at the two used pregnancy tests. Jon turned and walked out the bathroom door with Delia close on his heels. She changed into her holiday dress. It was a dark purple form fitting dress completed with black heels. Jon thought she looked stunning as she dressed in front of him, pinning her long blonde hair on top of her head, and then spritzing a light perfume on her wrists. She turned to him and smiled softly. "Ready?"

He nodded and stood up, walking over to her and pulling her into his chest tightly. He knew she was still pretty shaken up. She wrapped her arms around his waist and breathed in the scent of his clothes. He always smelt so good, even when he wasn't wearing any cologne. He smelt like safety, like motor oiland cigarette smoke.

"It's going to be alright," he mumbled against her forehead.

She smiled softly and clutched to his bicep. "Yeah. It is."

They walked downstairs hand-in-hand, watching as everyone looked up at them. Even though Jon had been around her family plenty of times before, he knew this was something he'd never get used to. They were a rich, powerful family with strong government ties. Everyone wore their hair neat and their clothes even neater. Jon, on the other hand, his hair was always falling over in his face and his clothes were neat, he made sure of that, but it wasn't a three piece suit like half of these snobs were wearing.

They knew him, though, and knew that he wasn't lacking in the money department due to the garage's increased activity lately. He felt Delia's hand grip his tighter and he looked down, noticing she was handing him a glass of wine with a smug smile on her face. "You know wine isn't my thing," he joked, but took the glass anyway.

"Delia you don't want any?" Her mother tilted her head at her daughter.

Delia slowly shook her head, trying to keep everything cool with her expression. "No…I'm not feeling it tonight."

"Alright then, sweetheart." Her mother smiled softly. "Your brother and his friends are outback. Jon you can join them if y-"

"No, mom. I don't think that'd be a good idea," Delia laughed softly as she gripped Jon's forearm. "They don't…really get along."

"Oh." Her mother was oblivious to the fact that Jon and Ryder had gotten into a fight. "Well alright! Don't keep to yourselves, talk to some people. Be sociable."

Delia laughed softly and moved closer to Jon to let a passing family member pass behind her before pulling him further into the crowd of people. They chatted with everyone for a long time and she was glad that Jon stayed until everyone had started leaving. They walked out on the now clear patio and sat in the swing. It was cold outside, and she huddled closer to him, laying her head on his shoulder.

She wrapped both of her arms around his much larger one and huffed, "I miss us Jon."

He grinned sadly and nodded. "Yeah me too."

"We can't deal with that hurt, though, huh?"

"No," he said sadly. "We've proven that."

"I guess the tides aren't right for us right now, huh?"

"Guess not, pretty girl," He smirked. "Maybe you can find someone that makes you happy. I couldn't do it. You deserve someone that does."

"You do make me happy," she said softly. "Just not when we are fighting. And when we're able to be close to each other. Being away from each other is what fucks us up, ya know?"

"Yeah." He shrugged. "I know…hey, you want your present now? Even though it's just Christmas Eve?"

"Jon, you didn't have to get me anything." She pinched his arm slightly causing him to squirm.

He shrugged. "Too bad."

"Wait!" She said and stood up. "I'll be right back."

He shook his head and pulled the small boxes from his pocket and looked over them with a soft smile before closing the lids again. She returned carrying numerous boxes wrapped in the decorative wrapping. She shoved them in his face and smiled brightly. "Open yours first."

He hesitantly tore into the wrapping, smiling as they came into view. Some of it was clothes, some of it was other dumb things. He got down to the last small box and looked up at her with a confused look as her hand came down on top of it. "Go ahead," she nodded and rubbed her hands together.

He tore the paper off the small black box and flipped the top, revealing a small silver band that had some sort of etched engraving on the inside. He looked over at her expectantly and she cleared her throat. "I thought maybe you'd like it. I was hesitant to give it to you now though, since… And so the engraving says 'J&D'. If you don't like it, or you don't want to wear it I understand. It's just that I want to make a promise to you…no matter what we go through, we'll be together in the end. Right?"

He nodded and blinked the stinging in his eyes away. "Right, pretty girl."

She watched as he sat the box down sadly. She understood if he didn't want to wear it. She knew this wasn't something that they were going to get over easily. She would give anything just to kiss him one last time, but that would open up an entire new portal and emotions would ring out wildly. That wasn't something she was willing to do right now, so she fought her control.

"Funny you mention promises," he smirked, as he placed the smaller boxes on her lap. "I think we think alike. That's sort of scary, huh?"

She chuckled. "Yeah. It is."

"Open them."

She tore into the wrappings and smiled when she came to three black boxes that looked identical to the one she had given him. She opened them all to reveal a beautiful set of jewelry – earrings, necklace, two bracelets, and a ring. All of it was diamond and the ring was very shinny.

"I'm not good at picking out jewelry, but I thought you might like it…" He scratched at the back of his head. "I don't know. I mean, it's pretty, isn't it?"

"They're beautiful." She smiled and hoped the tears were hidden from the darkness. "Thank you, Jon"

"You really mean it, huh?"

"Mean what?"

"No matter what, in the end, it's you and me," he asked, the hopeful look evident in his eyes.

"Yeah, I really mean it Jon." She nodded and slid the ring on her finger. "I love you, Jon. You know that. I hope you do."

"I know it." He nodded and pulled her into his lap. "I really do. You know I love you, too right?"

"Yeah I know."

She laid her head down on his shoulder and pressed her face into his neck, feeling the slight scruff against her cheeks and forehead. They sat there for a few minutes and she couldn't help herself. She pressed her lips to his neck and heard his inhale come sharply. "Delia," he mumbled and moved away. "I can't do that. Not if you don't want to be together."

"It's not that I don't want to, Jon," she huffed. "I just don't want it to be this painful."

He nodded. "I understand. Alright, pretty girl." He rubbed her back. "I think I'm going to get on home. You want to hang out tomorrow after all your family shit?"

"Yeah." She smiled sadly. "I'd love that."

She crawled off of his lap and the two of them made their way through the house. He bid a goodbye to her parents. When the two of them were standing at the front doorway her mother cleared her throat and pointed upwards. Delia's cheeks burned as Jon looked up. She should have known better than to let them hang the mistletoe over the doorway.

Without any further thinking, he pressed his lips softly down to hers and pulled away before she had time to kiss back. Without any further words, he was out the front door. Delia knew maybe she should have run after him and kissed him back, but she didn't. She stood and watched as he got into his car and left, the trail of smoke from the muffler the only thing left.

Her mom felt bad. "Delia I'm sorry, sweetie…I thought you had worked things over…"

"No," Delia smiled sadly. "We didn't."

She didn't want to hear anything else her mother said so she quickly bounded the steps for her room, locking the door behind her and stripping down immediately, tossing the tight dress to the side as she headed for her bathroom. She needed a long shower and a good night's rest.

She looked down at the test again resting on her sink and her heart pounded. She wrapped her robe around her as she picked up the test and looked at it further. This couldn't be it, this couldn't be right. It was false earlier!

She quickly took the unused test out of the packet, thanking God that they had bought an extra, and did the same routine as earlier.

The outcome was the same as before, except this time it was joined by another faint line. She sobbed and took off running for her mother's room and instantly collapsed beside her on the bed. Her father was still in the shower as she pulled the test out from behind her. "Mom…I think I'm pregnant."

* * *

_**Man...**_


	7. Chapter 7: Self Control Or Something

"What are you going to do, Delia?" The doctor asked sweetly, rubbing the frightened girl's thigh.

Delia had been avoiding Jon for the past two days due to this. This baby growing inside of her. His baby. His offspring. She had the option of aborting it, but that wasn't right in Delia's eyes. She wasn't happy, she wasn't proud of this, or him. She knew better than having unprotected sex at her young age, lust had gotten the best of her though. She was showing 3 weeks pregnant, or that's what the doctor said, and the baby was the size of a peanut. She looked up at the screen and smiled softly, this thing might have been a mistake but she loved it. She loved it already. This was hers. Hers and Jon's. Something they could love and raise together.

"I'm going to keep it," Delia smiled sadly, "Yeah…I'll keep it."

"There are other options, you know…there's adoption." The doctor offered.

Delia quickly shook her head, "No…no need for that. If the dad isn't happy then I guess I'll just be a single parent."

"I'm sure he'll be delighted, sweetheart." The doctor smiled sweetly, "You're all done! Everything looks great, really. We'll see you back in three weeks, okay?"

Delia nodded swiftly and waited for the doctor to leave to get dressed. She sat there for a few minutes; the blanket draped over her lap to hide her nudity, and broke down in a soft sob. This was her life. This was what was going to break her. She knew it. She'd get over it, though. It was now time to tell Jon.

Her mother walked in not too much longer after that and sat in the chair beside of the bed, rubbing her daughter's shoulder, "It's going to be alright sweetheart."

"How's it going to look on you and dad?" Delia sobbed as she wiped her eyes, "The preachers daughter being a whore with the towns misfits. Seems like some fucked up romance, huh?"

* * *

"Where've you been at?" Jon asked, watching as she flopped down on the couch beside of her. They had the house alone, her parents had left to take Ryder out to eat and then back to school since Jon was taking her back.

She shrugged, "I had a doctor's appointment today."

"Oh," He flicked the ashes off of his cigarette, "…you alright?"

"Yeah," She nodded gingerly. She had planned to tell him. Just to sit him down and tell him but he couldn't. It's like the words were slipped out of her mind, out of her entire body. She managed to look at him before saying anything else.

He looked at her warily before bringing the cigarette back to his lips and sucked on it like it was the best thing he'd ever had, his blue eyes squinted under an auburn fringe. He was wearing the dark grey shirt, this one was different from the other one, but he looked so good sitting on the couch. He leaned back into the arm rest and threw his arm over the back of it, "What's bothering you, D?"

She furrowed her brown and shook her head, "Nothing…I'm…I'm fine."

"Liar," He said, the smoke billowing out of his mouth, "So you ready to go?"

She laughed humorlessly and shook her head, "No. Not really. Trying to get rid of me already?"

"Fuck yeah, I am. I have a hot date." He grinned.

"Oh yeah?" She pushed at his shoulder, jealously pinged deep inside of her, "Who?"

"Me, a bottle of jack, a bag of weed, and my right hand." His grin deepened and she caught on to the not-so-funny joke, "I'm not that much of a scumbag, Delia."

"I'm sure as soon as I'm gone, you're going to go and find some sort of slut to fuck, aren't ya?" She giggled and reached for her phone but his hand crashed down on top of hers and he pressed his face into the side of her neck, sniffing her skin as if it was the last time he'd ever be able to.

"Never," He mumbled against her skin, his lips brushing over the pulse point in her neck, "Never."

She swallowed hard, knowing he heard her, but she didn't care. Not being able to have him dove her fucking insane. She nodded and pulled away from him, knowing exactly what he meant, but before she could say anything his lips were on hers, stealing that kiss he'd been wanting for a few days. Her body instantly responded in ways she didn't like, wetness pooled between her thighs, her breathing tightened, she kissed him back just as hard.

He felt his dick harden a little, the taste of her always done that to him. As cliché as it sounds, sparks flew deep inside of him. He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her so that she straddled his lap, crushing his lips up against hers. Her hips ground down against his, feeling everything – hip bones, the roughness of denim, and the sweet tent his bulge was making.

"We need to go," She mumbled against his lips, feeling his tongue swipe out over her bottom one.

He shook his head and patted the back of her thigh, "Yeah…we do."

"I…I'm sorry, Jon." She whispered, the thing she needed to tell him was nagging at the back of her throat, threatening to escape her lips. She felt if she talked too much, she'd let it slip and it wasn't something she wanted to talk about now.

He shook his head, "Don't be. We're…friends…and we need to remember that."

She quickly crawled off his lap, wanting so badly to stay, and grabbed her bags as he filed out the door behind her. She was embarrassed at herself and sense of lack of self-control around him, he could break her down any time he wanted too and he knew it. It's like he thrived from it, watching her squirm in the seat as they drove towards the school.

When the Impala hit the grounds of the school, the ground was covered with a thin layer of snow. He looked over and saw that, just like when he picked her up, the group of people were standing in the same spot. "Looks like Adam's awaited your return."

"Jon," She released a pent-up sigh, "Please don't start."

"His crush is cute." He joked, "He's…preppy."

"Yeah," She nodded and grinned, "He is, isn't he?"

And then he realized why he didn't like him, "He reminds me of David."

Her heart-felt like it stopped beating at Jon's confession and she looked at him like he was some sort of wild animal, "Why would you say that?"

He shook his head and laughed sarcastically, "I knew it."

"Knew what?" She instantly went into defensive mode, slapping those walls up ten feet high.

"Just…go. Have a great day, Delia." Jon stared at the steering wheel in disbelief. Adam wasn't the only one with a crush, Delia had one too. It was all clear to him now.

"You're fucking bipolar, Jon." Delia shook her head as she climbed out of the car, "One minute you want to fuck and now you're pissed off at me for a reason you won't even say?"

"I'm not going to argue with you. Just go. I'm going to leave." Jon shook his head.

"Doesn't surprise me," She scoffed and reached in the back for her bags, "You always leave when I need you the most."

"Stop lying," Jon shook his head, "And go. Just go be with your little friend, alright? Call me if you need anything."

"I need you, Jon." Delia shook her head, "You just don't seem to care."

He shook his head and smiled sadly, "You just fail to see it."

"What the fuck ever, Jon." She slammed the door shut and walked off. Jon sat and watched as she walked past the group of people, catching Adam's attention immediately. He grabbed some of Delia's bags and helped her up the stairs, confirming everything Jon had suspicion about. And it hurt.

* * *

_**Just want to say thanks to everyone who has reviewed! I love reading what you guys have to say. I've gotten the story written out completely and it's looking at like 26 chapters! Yikes! Never written one that long before. But, it'll only get better! Promise!**_


	8. Chapter 8

Delia laid in bed rubbing her stomach, her mind wandering off to the future. She was going to have a baby, she was pregnant with the man of her dreams, and yet it all seemed so disturbing and nerve wracking. She couldn't even get the courage up to tell Jon she was going to have his baby, and it hurt her. She felt that she couldn't be honest with him these last few months – if she did, he'd snap her head off just like he had been doing. She rubbed her temples as she thought back on their relationship. Everything was going so smooth, so great for them. And then she got accepted into the school and he shut down on her, pushed her away.

She'd been in school for two days now. It was Jon's birthday, and she'd tried fifteen times to call him, but he just sent it straight to voicemail. If he only knew what she was doing to him now, he'd surely push her away for good. That's why he couldn't know. He wasn't in the right frame of mind to be a father. She felt there was this barrier between them in their relationship, pushing the other away. She'd love to take his worries away, ease his pain, stop whatever had been going through that dark mind of his lately, but he won't let her in. He picked fights and was mean to her. She'd love to pick that mind of his, just to see what he really thought of her and their relationship.

She loved him, there was no lie behind that. She'd do almost anything for him. She just couldn't bring herself to let him know he'd created a baby. She didn't know what he would do, how he would react. She didn't know what had happened to him, but he wasn't the same. He was cold and distant towards her, yet she'd noticed he still acted the same toward Scotty. It saddened her. She'd give anything to be lying beside him, having his hand on her stomach as she laid her head on his chest.

"Hey." The familiar deep, raspy voice popped through the air from somewhere behind her. "We're going to go get something to eat…wanna come with?"

Delia smiled as she laid on her back, looking at Adam. "Yeah, I'll be down in just a sec, okay?"

"Sweet," Adam flashed that beautiful smile and pushed the hair out of his face. "We'll be waiting."

* * *

Jon had been working himself crazy these past two days. He couldn't keep his mind off of Delia. Even when he'd just sit and stare at the wall, he somehow imagined her. The way she'd laugh at him, tell him he was insane for acting so mopey, tell him to man up about it. Today was his birthday, he was finally turning 21, but to his disadvantage, he didn't have any time to celebrate, or anyone to celebrate with for that matter, so he kept the details to himself. He'd rather be alone anyway.

He sat and watched his phone buzz around on the desk for the sixteenth time. He knew it was Delia. He didn't really want to talk to her. Didn't feel worthy of talking to her. She knew he was jealous and that's what pissed him off even more. She knew she was under his skin.

Jon wiped his nose with the back of his hand, smearing the grease over his face. He didn't care. The sooner he got the cars done, the sooner he could go home and sleep. Something was wrong with the valve on the car he was working on. He could remember the way Delia had taunted him, telling him to 'fix my car, bitch'. That was when he knew he had to have her. Jon was intimidating, he knew people were scared of him, but she never once shied away from him. Not until now.

All of a sudden, someone slammed the hood of the car that he had his back turned to, and tapped him on the shoulder. He turned around to see the familiar head of blond hair.

"Sup, birthday boy?" Scotty smiled.

Jon shrugged. "Not much. And don't go parading that shit around, man."

"What?" Scotty grinned and raised his voice. "That it's your birthday?"

Jon threw the rag in his face and sighed. "Don't know what you're talking about."

"So we going out tonight or what," Scotty asked, leaning against the car, trying to hide the surprise he had planned.

"Yeah, I guess." Jon shrugged. "How's work going, man?"

Scotty sighed and shook his head. "I don't even wanna talk about that, man."

Jon chuckled. "That bad, huh?"

"You don't even know the half of it!"

Jon laughed and looked around the shop. "I think I know some of it."

"So yeah man, we'll catch up at the trailer, right?"

"Yeah man," Jon nodded and popped the hood again. "Later."

* * *

Delia sat in the booth, her body squeezed between two larger men that were chatting happily with each other. She ran her hands through her hair and sighed. It was too hot in the restaurant and she was no longer hungry. All of a sudden she was overcome with emotions. Her temper was even shorter now with her hormones a little out of whack already.

"Hey," she tapped Adam on the shoulder, "You mind letting me out? I want to go get some air."

"Yeah," Adam smiled at her; she felt her heart flutter each time he flashed that beautiful smile, "I'll come with you."

"No, no. You can stay here and eat," Delia said, sliding out of the booth after him.

Adam shook his head and shrugged. "Nah. I'm good. Plus, you don't need to be outside by yourself."

"I'm a big girl!" Delia laughed.

"Yeah," Adam nodded, "but you're also a pretty girl."

Delia cringed a little at the descriptive words. She knew Adam didn't mean anything by it, but it still reminded her of Jon. She walked toward the front door, squeezing through the clustered crowd, with Adam right on her heels. When she broke through the doors, she took a deep breath of air and looked over at Adam.

"You didn't have to come out here with me," Delia said softly. "I'd have been okay."

"Yeah, but I guess when you're away from your boyfriend, I need to be the protector." Adam smirked, sitting down on the stump.

"He's…we're not together anymore," Delia shrugged. "We…he said…we're just friends right now, Adam."

Lightbulbs went off in Adam's eyes as he listened to what Delia was saying. If they were friends, that meant she was single! On the outside, he was calm and cool, but on the inside he was giddy as a kid on Christmas. "Adam?"

"Yeah?" Adam looked up at her.

"I'm…sort of pregnant," Delia confessed, rubbing her stomach. "He doesn't know yet. I can't tell him. I know I should-"

"Uh, yeah you should!" Adam said, his eyes growing wide. "You should have told him when it happened!"

"Well," Delia shrugged, "I just don't feel like it's the right time for him to have a child."

Adam shook his head. "Jon might be a little psycho and possessive, but he at least deserves to know, ya know?"

Delia shrugged. "I think I want to go back to the dorms now."

"Yeah, okay." Adam nodded. "I'll drive you."

* * *

The bar was loud and lights beamed overhead as they flashed down on the dance floor. Scotty kept feeding Jon beer, bottle after bottle, and Jon wasn't going to push it away. He lost count after the twenty-third bottle. He downed them all, his head fogged with intoxication, and he couldn't see straight. All he knew was that there was a deep uneasiness settled in the pit of his stomach. His head spun faster and the room picked up with activity.

Next thing he knew, Scotty was shoving a small pill in his mouth, telling him to "Drink up, birthday boy!"

Jon knew better, but he did it anyway. A few seconds later a small film was placed on his tongue by some strange-looking girl just before she placed a soft kiss to his top lip.

He couldn't feel his body, things seemed to blur. The music pounded into his ears but it seemed far away. The next thing he remembered was being thrust outside into the cold air and looking down to find some girl with her mouth wrapped around his cock. He remembered her looking up at him and smiling, and she said something, but the words didn't connect with his ears.

"Don't know you," he groaned, pushing her head away, only to have her latch on to his thighs and suck him back further into her mouth. He just gripped her hair and shoved himself further down her throat. He watched her swallow his release, but he didn't feel it. Where was he? Who was that girl? He couldn't tell, he didn't know about anything right now.

"Jon!" He could hear Scotty's voice yelling at him as he pulled his pants back up and pushed himself back into his boxers. "C'mon man!"

"W-here…?" He mumbled incoherently, feeling the blond-headed man's arm wrap around his shoulder. "Scot-t-ty?"

"Yeah man!" Scotty yelled, pulling him towards the parking lot. "I think you've had too much, man."

Jon knew he was fucked up. His surroundings didn't look familiar. He didn't know where he was. This wasn't the bar he had begun at earlier tonight. He was shoved in the backseat of a truck and watched as the same strange-looking girl that was sucking his dick earlier drove. He looked at her through glassy eyes and saw her smiling at him in the review mirror. At least, through glassy eyes, she was pretty.

* * *

Delia had tears brimming in her eyes as she sat her phone down on the coffee table. She felt Adam's hand rubbing slow, soothing circles on her back, and it was comforting, but she was worried. Jon hadn't answered her calls all day. She'd called him over thirty times and the last ten had gone to voicemail automatically, showing that his phone was either dead or it was cut off to avoid her. Even though she didn't want to think about it, she knew it was the last reason.

"Hey," Adam said softly, wrapping his arm around her shoulder and pulling her into his embrace. "It's all going to be okay, right?"

"Nothing's okay, Adam. He won't answer my calls. It's over between him and I. I know it is. I just don't want to accept it." Delia sobbed softly, her tears streaking her face now.

She felt the padding of Adam's thumb wiping her cheeks. "Hey, hey, he isn't worth these tears baby girl. He isn't worth getting upset over."

"Yes he is." She shook her head. "He's worth it. He's worth everything."

"Is he worth upsetting your baby over?" Adam whispered, resting his hand over her belly. "Is he worth the stress? What did we learn today in science? Hmm?"

"When the mother gets stressed, the baby will get stressed too," Delia whispered, wiping at her tears. "But it's his baby, too. He should be responsible."

"How is he going to be responsible if he doesn't know about it, hmm?" Adam kept his voice low and calming. "Tell me pretty baby."

"I don't want him to know." Delia shook her head. "He can't know."

"That's something you're going to have to work at. I can't force you to do anything. I'll be here to help you through it all, though. Okay?" Adam brought her hands up to his lips and kissed them softly. A slight tingly sensation ran through her fingers when his lips brushed against her skin. "Right?"

She nodded breathlessly. "Yeah."

He smiled softly, knowing that she felt that too, and stroked her hair. "Delia…can I kiss you?"

* * *

_**...I think I just heard a cricket chirp.**_  
_**Review!**_


	9. Chapter 9

_"Can I kiss you, Delia?"_

She could have slapped herself. She didn't even respond to him. She just did it. Pressed her lips to his and kissed him. She had to admit, he was a good kisser. But he wasn't Jon. Nobody, from her experience, could kiss as good as Jon could. But she did it. Jon didn't give a fuck about her anyway, he had shown that tonight. Made her look like an idiot in front of Adam. She wasn't going to play his fucking games anymore. No, now she was pissed more than hurt. Jon was stupid. He was so fucking stupid, and she hated him so much, but she couldn't deny the fact that she'd always love him. It obviously just wasn't the right time for them. Maybe all they would ever be was a summer-fling. People had them all the time, why couldn't she just push their relationship to that standard?

She knew deep down why it couldn't happen. Because they loved each other. Or at least she hoped he returned her feelings. Maybe his phone was dead or something. Maybe, she thought, she didn't need to jump to conclusions. Then again, she knew if she didn't and acted all dumb about this, he'd crush her in the end. Maybe it was time for Delia to get the one-up. She was young. She didn't have to waste her entire life on one single ignorant guy, right? Maybe they weren't good enough for each other. Maybe she wasn't good enough for him. That's what it had to be, right? That's why he kept ignoring her. It had to be.

"Delia," Adam whispered. "You should go to bed, alright? We have a huge test tomorrow. Plus, you need to release this stress."

"Yeah," Delia nodded. "Thanks for today."

"Yeah," Adam nodded. "Thanks for uh…the kiss."

* * *

Jon groaned as he held his pounding head, sitting up on the edge of his bed. He couldn't remember anything that had happened in the last 24 hours. The last thing he could remember was Scotty saying it was his birthday. After that, nothing. Not even the memories of how he had gotten back into his room. He only knew his body hurt, his head was dizzy, and his phone was dead. As he reached to plug the phone up, he could smell the faint smell of someone cooking and he felt his stomach lurch, the contents of last night's rendezvous coming back up. He rushed for the bathroom, stepping over clothes and other things he wouldn't describe before expelling it all into the ceramic toilet, clutching at his sides. His entire body shook with heaves, his throat and sinuses burned even worse.

When he finally stopped, he managed to crawl into the shower, turning nothing but the cold water on. Letting the cold drops wash down over his bare skin, he felt himself slowly sobering up, but the aches didn't stop. He didn't know what time it was, whether it was past noon or not. He didn't care about anything but getting more sleep. He turned the water off and grabbed a pair of boxers out of his room before walking into the rest of the house, immediately feeling under-dressed as he realized there was a woman standing over the stove. But with one look over at the couch, and a look at Scotty's completely nude form lying on said couch, he realized he wasn't as indecent as he thought. She turned to him and smiled, in only a pair of panties herself. Jon could vaguely remember seeing her last night, but he didn't remember why. "You're up!"

"Yeah," Jon groaned as he watched her crack the egg. "Who…are you?"

She giggled and nodded softly. "I thought you'd say that. I'm Janice."

"Oh, uh…did you come back here with Scotty or something?"

"Well," she laughed again, "I came back here with you but you passed out on me."

"Fuck," he growled at himself. "I'm…sorry I guess."

"It's okay," she giggled. "You were pretty fucked up."

"Yeah," he laughed. "Yeah…I don't remember anything."

"Nothing?" She smirked.

"Not even the beginning of the night."

"Well that's too bad." She shook her head. "You're a fun guy when you're drunk, ya know?"

Jon shrugged. "Don't remember it."

"Take my word," she said over her shoulder as she flipped the eggs. "You're hilarious. You even sang karaoke to 'Eye of the Tiger'. You had the entire place singing along with you."

"Oh god." Jon shook his head in embarrassment. "That's just horrid."

"It wasn't _that _bad!" Janice giggled. "You want some food, huh?"

"No." Jon wrinkled his nose and shook his head. "Not at all."

"C'mon, it'll make you feel better," she edged him. "It always makes me feel better."

"What time is it?" Jon groaned.

"Twelve-fifteen," she nodded softly. "Jon…do you have a girlfriend?"

Suddenly, the realization that his phone was still turned off dinged in his head and he sighed. "Fuck!"

"I'm sorry." Janice furrowed her brow, "I…I didn't mean for you to…sorry-"

"No, no. It's not you." Jon shook his head and stood up. "I just remembered my phone was turned off. I'll be right back."

"Okay." She smiled softly as she sat down with her plate of food. "Scotty! Get some clothes on!"

"Fuck you," Scotty groaned, rolled over, and went right back to sleep.

Jon rushed down the messy hallway. He made a mental note to clean the place up, but later. Right now he had to get to his phone. He sat and waited impatiently as the screen popped up. It always took too long for this thing to come up, he thought. He hated technology, so it didn't really matter.

"Fuck," he growled as he realized he had thirty missed calls. All from the same number. Delia. His heart pounded in his chest. He didn't know whether he should call her or not. He knew she was going to yell and bitch. Maybe he shouldn't. His head hurt too bad to hear all of that. He wasn't any good for her. He shouldn't waste her time. But he wanted to hear her voice. Maybe just one last time. He slowly pushed her number into the corresponding keypad and waited. Surprisingly, on the first ring her disheveled voice came through.

"Jon, what the fuck?" She demanded instantly.

"I know," Jon whispered softly. "I'm sorry."

"No," She laughed humorlessly. "If you were sorry you'd have picked up one of the forty fucking times I called you. Sorry doesn't fucking cut it anymore, Jon. I was worried sick about you. I couldn't get Scotty on the phone, what if something had happened to me and your-"

"My what?" Jon's brow furrowed; what the fuck was she talking about?

"Never mind." She shook her head. "I just…are you okay?"

"Hung over." He lay back on the bed.

"Well…I tried to tell you happy birthday last night but you wouldn't answer."

"Yeah," Jon said softly.

"You have a good time?" Delia asked, softly rubbing her stomach. She didn't know why she did it, she wasn't even showing yet, but it was comforting.

"I don't remember it. "

"Not anything?" She questioned, reveling in the tone of his raspy voice. "Not anything?"

"Nope."

"Jon…did you…turn your phone off so I wouldn't bother you? All I wanted to do was wish you a happy birthday, that's all. I would have left you alone if I knew you were going out. I promise I would have. You just worried me."

"No," Jon shook his head. "My phone died. I didn't ignore you. I would never do that." It was a lie, but she didn't need to know that.

Suddenly, Jon heard a deep voice begin to rumble through on her line and the hairs on the back of his neck stood. He knew that voice but obviously the voice didn't know he was on the phone. "Pretty girl, let's head to class alright?"

"I'll be right there, Adam," she called, sounding way too friendly in Jon's eyes.

Jon's heart pounded in his chest. That was it. He couldn't do it anymore. They had managed to end up like this, even though he had promised her they wouldn't. But they did. This was happening to them.

"What the fuck…" Jon laughed humorlessly. His heart felt like it had stopped beating. Why the fuck was Adam in her dorm?

"Jon," she whispered. "It isn't like that."

"Bull-fucking-shit, Delia. You think I'm fucking stupid, don't you?"

"I don't think you're stupid, Jon. Don't say that."

"No, you do. You think that it's okay to just come into my life, make me fall in love with you, and then you fuck it all up. Fuck my perception up. You always do. That's all you fucking girls do."

"Jon…" Delia shook her head. "No, I haven't fucked anything up. You're just being a complete fuckhead about it."

"Oh, I'm the fuckhead, huh?" Jon scoffed. "Yeah. Always am. Fucked up in the head, right? I'm just some grubby boy from the gutters of Cincinnati and I'm just completely fucked up in the head. Why don't you tell me something I don't know, _pretty girl_?"

"I'm not doing this anymore, Jon. I'm not going to have you get upset and pissed at me for no reason. I haven't done anything to you." Delia shook her head as the tears stung her head; she couldn't believe he was acting like this. Well, then again, yeah she could. She couldn't let Jon know about the soft kiss, though. He would surely have both of their heads.

"So you're done with me, right?" Jon stood up and pulled his pants on.

"I don't want to be, but I think it's the best for right now."

"Fine," he sighed. "I'll give your shit to your mother."

"Okay." She shook her head, knowing that he couldn't see it. "Jon…I got to get to class."

She didn't hear his response, or even if he gave one, but the sound of static came through signaling she had hung up on him. This was it. There was no more Jon and Delia. That wouldn't happen. She'd learn to get over him. She had too. Right?


	10. Chapter 10

"So," Angela said into the phone, "I saw Jon today…and he had someone else with him."

"Another girl?" Delia said softly a few minutes later.

"Yeah," Angela, "They were walking out of the bar."

"Did…did he look happy?"

"Honestly, he looked tired."

"Oh."

"He called her 'Jan', but then I heard Scotty call her by Janice. They seemed friendly."

"Well, that's good." Delia kept her tears back. She wasn't going to cry because of him anymore. She wouldn't give him that satisfaction. She wouldn't give anyone that satisfaction. "Hey, well I'm gonna go. I've got a lot of studying to do for a big test tomorrow and Adam's going to help me."

"Delia, are you and the baby okay? Don't you think you need to come home?"

"No," Delia smiled, "We're fine. It's still growing every day. I'll be home around my due date though because of summer."

"Alright, well, you still haven't told him?"

"No."

"Jesus, D! You need to tell him like yesteryear."

"I will. Eventually."

"You're being fucking stupid."

"Yeah, but it's my fucking body and it's my baby and I don't give a fuck what anyone else says. You're supposed to be my best friend, Angela. You're supposed to be there for me when I need a shoulder to lean on. All you ever do is bitch me out. Maybe you should be fucking supportive for a change."

"Listen here, bitch." Angela snapped, "I'm not someone who you can fool. I know you. I know your ways. You're a bitch, Delia. We all know that. But we love you. Your mother is worried sick about you being so far away and pregnant at the same time. I've always been supportive of you. So don't give me that shit."

Delia just hung the phone up. She was tired of arguing with everyone. It felt like everyone was out to get her. She hated it. But the news of Jon being seen out with a new girl hurt her even more. Her heart hurt. Not even two weeks into it all being over and he was already with another girl. Maybe it was hypocritical, but Jon was hers.

* * *

Jon sat in the shop of the garage, watching everyone clock out. He felt pressured, like something was about to go off but he didn't know what it was. Everything felt so different. Maybe it was because nothing was the same for him. Everything was turned upside down the last phone call he and Delia shared. She was under his skin and she didn't even try to be. He had to get away for a little while. Even if it was just a short drive.  
So there goes my life

_**Passing by with every exit sign**_  
_**It's been so long**_  
_**Sometimes I wonder how I will stay strong**_  
_**No sleep tonight**_  
_**I'll keep on driving these dark highway lines**_  
_**And as the moon fades**_  
_**One more night gone, only twenty more days**_

The hum of the motor rung soundly to Jon's ears as he sat behind the steering wheel of the Chevy Impala. He didn't know where he was going. He couldn't stay in that room. Or that trailer. He was alone tonight, Janice had to leave for work and Scotty was invested in some woman pretty heavily now. He didn't want to admit it, but he was heartbroken. He loved her. And she wouldn't be there anymore. He knew he was acting like a pansy, but it fucking hurt, and men could have broken hearts. It wasn't anything to be ashamed of.  
It had been two weeks since his and Delia's last conversation. The one that had ended it all for them. He's tried to get over her, sleep with Janice twice, but he couldn't. Something stopped him. He didn't know what it was, but he couldn't go through with it. Janice didn't feel right when she laid beside of him or consoled him after he had a breakdown. Nothing was right for him now.

Roads seemed to blur and exit signs started to look strange. He had a full tank of gas so there wasn't any stopping for a while. Just endless straight driving, to see where he ended up at. He wasn't tired, he couldn't sleep. Actually, he hadn't slept in his bed for a couple of days now. He knew he should stop acting like this, get over her, or at least try harder. He just wanted to see her one last time. And he didn't know when that last time would be, but he had to.

**_But I will see you again_**  
**_I will see you again a long time from now_**

"You okay, pretty girl?" Adam asked, looking up at her.

"Yeah, I'm okay." Delia nodded; she had to be. She could do this. Delia had no intentions of this happening. But it was happening. Jon obviously didn't have enough love for her to care that she was hurting, too. She watched as Adam took her pants off, sliding them slowly down her legs. She knew she should have stopped him, but it felt good. He wasn't Jon, he didn't taste or smell the same, but she couldn't waste her time on hurting over him. Regardless of the fact that she was pregnant. She would be alright. Adam knew she was pregnant, he knew to be a bit more careful. Most of all, she thought he respected her.

Adam kissed up the front of her thighs, moaning in the softness of her skin. She could close her eyes and still feel Jon's lips all over her, but Adam was ruining that. He was replacing Jon's memory, and it made her uncomfortable. She tugged on his hair, pulling him closer up to her panties. When she felt his hands on her thighs, she sat up and pushed away from him.

"Please," Delia whispered, "Can you just give me a few minutes?"

"Yeah, sure." Adam huffed as he sat back on his heels, "I'll be in the bathroom I guess."

Delia nodded softly and waited until he shut the door to sigh. Jon had obviously moved on. It was a fact, Angela had told her how many times she has seen him out with another girl. Someone he called 'Jan' and had been seen with at bars, getting drunk with. From what people were telling her, he seemed happy. She could let him move on and her new beginning started with Adam. She just had too.

After a few minutes of being alone, "Okay," She said a little loud so Adam could hear her, "I'm ready."  
Within seconds, Adam was on her again, pushing her to the bed and claiming her lips. His taste wasn't bad, but it wasn't Jon. She'd learn to get over it. She laid further back on the bed and felt his fingers on her panties again, pulling at them off her body before she could protest. His head dove between her legs.

His tongue lapped slowly at her, licking up her taste. She closed her eyes even tighter, trying to imagine the softness of Jon's hair in between her fingers but she couldn't. Just cold, hurtful memories stung her. She couldn't do that to Jon. She shouldn't be doing this to herself. But she was. She was going to force herself to get over him.

All too soon, she felt the bed shift and a foreign, unknown cock shoved inside of her. She winced a little, He wasn't a very nurturing lover. She wanted to tell him to stop, but she couldn't. She had to use him to get over Jon.

Jon didn't know what had made him show up. He just needed to see her. See that she was doing okay. Which was why he was standing outside of her door of the dorm rooms. He could hear some movement in her room and he suddenly stopped himself from opening the door. This wasn't right, he shouldn't be here. She said she was done with him, that she wanted to be left alone. He should respect that wish of hers. But as soon as he heard a manlier moan come from the room, his blood started boiling. She wasn't in there alone.

_**And there goes my life**_  
_**Passing by with every departing flight **_  
_**And its been so hard**_  
_**So much time so far apart**_  
_**And she walks the night**_  
_**How many hearts will die tonight**_  
_**And will things have changed**_  
_**I guess I'll find out in seventeen days**_

The door swung open and Delia couldn't almost believe her eyes. What was he doing here? Why was he here? Adam quickly withdrew from her and ran to the bathroom, leaving her exposed to Jon's shocked gaze. She felt as small as a grain of rice under his scrutinizing gaze. He was pale, all colors drained from his face. All she could see was disgust. Jon was disgusted in her. He let out a soft scoff and shook his head before walking down the hallway; his heavy boots clattering down against the wooden hallway was all she could hear.

"Jon!" She called as she wrapped her rope around her and took off running after him, "Wait! Please!"

"Stay away from me, Delia." He said softly, but he never looked back at her.

"No! Listen to me!" Delia reached for his wrist put he quickly pushed her away from him and turned sharply to look at her,

"I said to stay the fuck away from me, slut." Jon snapped at her as he glared down at her.  
Her brow furrowed at his words, "Maybe I am a slut. But you said you were done. I was trying to move on."

"So that gives you the right to go and sleep with some random faggot, right?"

"He's not random! He's been there for me a whole hell of a lot more than you have these past two months. I'm so sick and tired of your mouth, Jon. You think that just because you say you're done, that I can't move on? Isn't that what you wanted me to do?"

He shoved her a little too hard up against the wall and got down in her face, "Do you not see that I'm in love with you? Goddamn, Delia. What do I have to do? Do I have to get it tattooed across my fucking face?"

"Who's Janice, Jon?"

"What do you mean, who's Janice?" He laughed, "Stop trying to turn this around on me. You're the one that's fucked this all up."

"I'm not stupid, Jon. I have people keeping up on you."

"Yeah, well tell your little eye to come and suck my fucking dick," Jon laughed sarcastically, "You know, people told me that you were a bitch and I never believed them. Now I'm thinking maybe I should've. That's what you are. You are a fucking bitch, do you realize this?"

"It's not like I knew you were coming! Jesus, Jon. Yeah. I am a bitch. Call me all the names that you want if it'll make you feel better."

"I should call you a lot fucking more but I'm not. What'll make me feel better is when you get it through your fucking skull that I'm in love with you.

_**But I will see you again**_  
_**I will see you again a long time from now**_

They both sat there in silence for a few moments and Jon dropped his head to hers, "I'll leave if that's what you want. If you think that's what's best. But I don't want you to call me. I don't want that pain of having to talk to you. You seem to be doing fine without me, maybe it's time I learn how to do the same."

"I'm sorry, Jon." Delia whispered as her face contorted with tears, "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

"Yeah, well we all are sometime or another." He shrugged and took a few steps back, "I'll uh…I'll see you around."

Jon walked away before he could look back at her again. He felt stupid. Ignorant. Dumb. He knew he should have just been done with her the last time. But seeing her having sex, with someone that wasn't him, was the last straw. He couldn't do it anymore. It hurt too bad to be with her, all she knew was how to hurt him. She didn't know how to love anyone else but herself, that's all she cared about.

Jon got into his car and started to head home. He felt the unfamiliar sting of tears at his eyes and tried to blink them off but it was no use. He should be used to women using him. Every relationship he's ever had with a woman, they always cheated or he figured they were using him. Delia was supposed to be different, and it hurt to walk away, but she wasn't good for him.

_**My body aches, **_  
_**and it hurts to sing, **_  
_**and no one is moving**_  
_**And I wish that I weren't here tonight, **_  
_**but this is my life**_

Jon had all decisions to go home but when he pulled up into the driveway, he couldn't force himself to go in. He had to get away from the trailer; it's what brought back all the memories. He sat there for a few minutes, wondering what bar was open or where he could go. Most of his friends were asleep. He started his car and backed out of the driveway and drove until he saw a string of apartments. The loud motor of his car cut off and he sat there for a few minutes, contemplating whether she was up. He wanted to see her, though, so he crawled out of his car and locked the door behind him.

He knocked a few times on the door before he heard the locks unlocking and he was rewarded with another pretty face, "Jon! Are you okay?"

"I'll be alright," He shrugged and stepped inside once the door was open to him.

"You look like you've been crying," Janice said as she locked the door behind him. She was worried, but was a little happy he came to her for comfort.

"Yeah, well, like you said. I was going to get hurt. And I did." Jon shrugged, watching as she sat down on the her couch and patted the space beside of her.

"Sit down," She said sternly. She knew exactly what he was talking about. Only Delia could hurt him this bad, it's all she's been doing, and Janice was tired of seeing someone like Jon hurt over a bitch like her. "Tell me what happened."

"I went to see her," Jon said, laying his head in her lap, "And I walked in on her having sex with Adam…I knew I shouldn't have went. But I did. I should have listened to you."

Janice slowly stroked his hair; it hurt her to see him this broken. He was normally the strong silent type, she could kill Delia. "She just doesn't know how good she had it."

_**And I will see you again**_  
_**I will see you again a long time from now**_

* * *

Delia, you bitch.


	11. Chapter 11

Delia sat there and watched as he walked off with tears running down her face. She rubbed her shoulders where he had pushed her. There were already bruises forming. She knew she deserved more from him. She would have slapped the shit out of him if she had caught him. She wanted to tell him she was pregnant, maybe it would have calmed him down. She was doing nothing more than trying to get over him, and he had made her feel so guilty for trying to do what he should have been doing as well. He confused her, she knew she was confusing as well, but it's like it seeped out of his core. Confusion swirled around him. He had agreed to be friends, and she knew it wasn't what they both wanted, but they had to do it in order to keep their sanity.

She looked up to see some of her college friends staring down at her. She knew they had witnessed it all. A newer girl, named Stella, was the first to sit beside her. She wrapped her arm around Delia and rubbed the shaken girl's shoulder in an effort to calm her. Delia could hear hiscar cranking up in the parking lot and it only resulted in her crying harder.

"He's not worth it," Stella whispered. "You're too good for him."

Delia wiped her nose on the sleeve of her robe and shook her head. "No I'm not. I'm no better than any of the other girls in his life. They've all done him wrong and I just followed that trend."

"Well honey, I don't know you two's past, but I know one thing's for sure…you can tell that there is love between the two of you. He's not worth getting your baby upset over, okay?"

"That's…that's my baby's dad." Delia cried as she rubbed her stomach. "I fucked it all up for us."

"No," Stella whispered, "You didn't. Stop saying that, okay? I'm sure things will be okay. Just give him some time to cool down. He seemed pretty heated. He shouldn't have pushed you, but we all do pretty ignorant things when we're mad."

Delia wanted to run out and catch him before he left, she could still hear his car, but she didn't. She shook her head and stood up, walking back up to her dorm room. She locked the doors and crawled into bed as she looked over the diamond promise ring he had given her for Christmas. He was gone. There was no getting him back, and she only had herself to blame. She knew no Jonathan Good anymore.

* * *

Janice's eyes were the first to open and she looked around her bedroom. Her eyes looked up at the tall white ceiling as she smiled. She didn't really remember all of it, but the ride to the bar was fun. The warm body beside her started groaning and tossing in his sleep, and as she looked down at his naked form, she was greeted with a head full of wild auburn hair. Jon wasn't in a good place at this time in his life. It had been three months since the last time he spoke to Delia. She knew it was hurting him, even though he tried not to let her see it. She had fallen hard for him the past three months, she did love him, but she knew he could up and leave her at any time during their relationship, so she kept her ground when it came to him.

Janice had become a regular in Jon's life ever since the night that he had come to her after catching Delia and Adam together. It felt good being around her. She was in his league and he didn't feel the need to try and impress her or her parents. Janice didn't know her parents, and they sort of clicked in the sense of being bastard kids. His eyes cracked open and looked up to find her already awake. His body ached as he moved further up in the bed and kissed her softly, getting a soft one back.

"Morning," he mumbled, rubbing her thigh.

She nuzzled her way into his arms and wrapped them tightly around her. "Morning."

"I gotta go to work," he groaned, letting a yawn escape his mouth as she cuddled him closer.

"I hate that." She giggled.

"Yeah, I do too. But, I'll be done before you know it."

"Promise?"

"Promise."

"Yeah, but that still isn't going to hold me over until you get back home…"

He chuckled and slid down her body. "You didn't get enough last night?"

"I don't remember anything from last night," she laughed, running her hands through his hair as he looked over her already wet cunt. "Did we have sex?"

"Ouch!" He laughed, pretending to be hurt at her question. "I'm upset that you don't remember the mind-blowing sex last night…"

She bit her bottom lip to hide her smile and looked down at him resting between her thighs. "Must have not been that mind-blowing then."

"That's it!" He laughed, ignoring her squeal as he lunged for her neck and placed harsh kisses all over the tender skin and tickled her sides.

"Jon!" She squealed. "Stop it! That tickles."

"Well that's the point," he chuckled, moving to brush a few stands of her dark hair out of her eyes. Reaching down between the two of their naked bodies, she stroked the already half-hard cock. He slowly fucked her hand, pressing his lips down to hers. Her free hand roamed his back as she guided him into her, making the both of them moan softly.

He could see himself being happy with her, for a pretty long time at that, but she had to let go of her worries and trust him. He'd do anything to get her to trust him. He closed his eyes and quickened his pace as her moans filled his ears. She moaned like Delia. Sometimes he wished she'd be quiet, or at least not sound so much like her.

The thought and image of seeing Delia and Adam together still rang through his mind. And fuck, it hurt. He had all but gotten over her when thoughts of her would swarm his mind again. It's like he didn't want to let go of her, and deep down inside of him, he knew that was the truth. He'd hang onto memories of her for as long as they'd stay with him. He didn't want to give up on her, but he knew to be with Janice fully, he'd have to. There was no use in living in the hope of past relationships.

"I love you, you know?" Janice half moaned, half whispered in his ear as she twirled a piece of his hair around her finger tightly.

"Love you, too," Jon mumbled as he buried his face in the crook of her neck; it wasn't a lie. He did love her. He felt it grow a little more every day. It was just something that had happened out of nowhere. He would catch her in random moments, deep in thought, or scratching the back of her neck and laughed to himself at the way her top lip curled as she stretched. She was the farthest he could get from Delia.

Of course, other things had come up in their relationship. Other substances and drugs. It had become almost a nightly thing for them to go out and get trashed out of their minds. They had money, and nothing to do with it now, so the partying just happened naturally.

After dizzying orgasms had come and left, he crawled out of her bed with a quick kiss to her chest and began getting ready for work. He was joined in the shower by Janice. He watched as she washed her hair as he leaned back against the cool tiled wall. She was beautiful. Everything he wanted in a girl right now.

* * *

"Is that all?" Delia smiled up at Adam who was packing the back of her car to head back to Florida. It was mid-March, and she was more than ready to get out of the dorm rooms for spring break. She was going to introduce Adam to her parents and her brother, and any other person she encountered while there. She had a lot to show off.

Delia was now three months pregnant, and had started to show a little bit. The slightly tight dress showed off her little baby bump and people kept putting their hands on it when she walked past them in the hallways. Everyone knew, and she had talked with administrators about her pregnancy. They had agreed to continue to let her study with them, and granted her time off to recover from her birth when that time came. Thankfully, she'd be delivering after she took her finals and she could take a few weeks off without missing too much class work.

"All ready, babe. Just waiting on you." Adam's charming smile shown as he bent down and kissed her.

The drive was long, somewhere around two hours. Delia was never a good passenger. She liked to drive, but Adam was adamant about him driving in case of anything was to go wrong. She could tell her cared about her, but it wasn't close to the love that Jon had supplied her with. It just didn't happen that way with Adam; they were completely different people.

When they arrived at her mother's house, the entire family was waiting on them. They got out and greeted them all. Everyone was confused about Adam and surprisingly they all seemed unhappy to not see Jon beside her, but they were all extremely sweet to Adam.

Her mother pulled her to the side. "So have you told him?"

"Adam knows I'm pregnant," Delia nodded and grinned.

"I'm not talking about Adam, I'm talking about Jon. Does Jon know he's going to be a father?"

"No, he doesn't know. I haven't told him. He won't answer my phone calls or anything when I try to call him."

"You're being ignorant about this, you know?"

"Mom, this is my life. This is my baby-"

"It isn't just your baby, Delia Lynn. Jonathan is going to be a father. Not this Adam guy you brought home."

"Will you please respect my decisions, mom?" Delia said softly.

"No," her mom shook her head. "I'll respect you because you're my daughter, but this decision is stupid and you're just being ignorant as well."

"Okay mom, that's fine!" Delia replied sarcastically. "I'm going to go over here with my boyfriend now, if you respect that decision."

Her mother scoffed as she walked off. Delia didn't look back at her as she twirled under Adam's arm and wrapped her arm around his waist. Everyone congratulated her on her pregnancy, and she thanked them, but no one dared to mention Jon around Adam. She knew once Adam had left her side, she'd be swarmed with questions regarding the whereabouts of her baby's father.

* * *

"Sir," Janice's voice piped up from somewhere behind Jon before she wrapped her arms around his sweaty waist and kissed away a salty drop of perspiration from his back. "I do think you owe me a date tonight."

"Yeah?" He laughed and straightened up from under the hood and sat the wrench down before turning around in her arms and kissing her sweetly. "You know…you're really distracting me from my work."

"Well, Mr. I am sorry. But you owe me a date and there's a spring festival going on downtown tonight," she grinned.

"Let me guess," he smirked. "You want to go, huh?"

"It'll be different from our usual night out. I think our kidneys need it."

"Yeah," he chuckled. "Alright. We'll go. I get off in an hour. I want to take a shower before, though."

She kissed him quickly and smiled. "Alright. See you then, baby boy."

The smack he left on her ass as she walked off stung his hand and he caught the dangerous little grin she gave him as she turned around and winked. "Hurry!"

An hour and a shared shower with Janice had quickly passed and soon they were in the midst of the overly heated, crowded downtown of Pensacola, Florida. They had broken away from the group they were with and had ventured off on their own. It was just past sundown and the world was still slightly illuminated by the sun. Janice and Jon walked with their hands in the other's back pockets as they ventured further and further into the crowd.

A local band was playing some sort of crappy reggae cover song and they watched as random kids and elder people danced along, their dancing just as crappy as the actual song itself. It was a beautiful night and the rising moon shone beautifully on the lake as the two lovers stood off to the side. "Hey, I'm going to stop by the restroom, alright?" She smiled up at him.

"Yeah, I'll be right here." He kissed her forehead softly and leaned further back against the pole, watching as she walked off. Once she was out of his sight, his eyes scanned the crowd and caught the three men walking up to him. Scotty, Joe, and Sami all high tailed it over to him. But something else seemed to catch his eye. The familiar head of dirty blonde hair stuck out to him like a sore thumb. Standing less than ten feet away from him was still the most beautiful girl he'd ever laid his eyes on. Delia was smiling up at Adam like he was the greatest thing in the world as she sucked on her straw. She looked great. Sort of fat, though. Maybe their separation had really gotten her down into the dumps. Her dress was tight looking. She had this sort of glow to her, though. She was still perfect in his eyes.

"Dude," Scotty's voice interrupted his thoughts, "Is that D?"

"Yep," Jon nodded. "That's Delia."

"Dude…what's wrong with her?" Joe asked as he cocked his head, "She looks…"

"…pregnant…" Sami laughed. "Man…didn't you walk in on him and her?"

All of a sudden, everything felt like it was getting louder as he watched Adam rub his hands softly over Delia's swollen belly. The background noise got louder and louder and he felt his forehead start to sweat. This wasn't happening. It couldn't happen. He had to get her back. Now Adam had her for forever. She was pregnant with Adam's baby.

* * *

_**Hmm, but now what will be Jon's reaction now?**_  
_**Review! **_


	12. Chapter 12

That night, Jon couldn't get away from everyone fast enough. His heart hurt, he felt like he couldn't breathe. He sat in the parking lot of his shop for a few minutes before getting out and slamming the door. He smoked a few cigarettes as he thought back to seeing Delia and Adam being all lovey-dovey. It was disgusting. He couldn't stand it. He had almost convinced himself that he didn't love Delia, and then she showed up out of nowhere looking as beautiful as ever and having another man rubbing her pregnant belly. A belly that he should be rubbing, rubbing and whispering sweet things to when the baby was acting wild and kicking her. He should have that family, that should have been his baby, and he should have her beside him at night.

Don't get him wrong, he loves Janice. He loved her so much, but she wasn't Delia. She didn't smell like Delia, she definitely didn't look like her, didn't taste like her, didn't love like Delia did. Janice was wild and she was a party animal. He was used to a quiet and reserved girl. Delia seemed to balance him out, while Janice was still figuring out the equation that he was. He wished her the best of luck, there was still stuff about his own self that he hadn't ever figured out. He never took the time. Delia was someone he would love for forever. You can't choose who you love, who you fall in love with, and sometimes that's what hurts the most. When you finally realize that you can't 'unlove' someone. It doesn't work that way.

He'd give anything to have Delia beside him – to be inside of her every night, having her there when he got off work. He missed her smell and the way she kissed him. He wanted to love Janice fully; he knew it's what would be best for him. But he couldn't shake Delia. Maybe it was because he felt if he gave up, she'd never come back. He couldn't deal with that. He could lose Delia fully. And that scared him.

A text drew him out of his reverie and he smiled when he saw Janice's name flash over the screen.

**_'Where r u? R u OK?'_**

He realized then that he had been sort of mean to her and had cut their night-out short. He felt bad, he felt horrible. He knew he needed to give up on Delia, to let that small glimmer of hope of there ever being a reunion of the two of them go, and put everything he had in Janice. She had trust issues, and so did he, but the two of them…they just clicked instantly. She was the first girl he had fallen so hard and so quickly for. He had trouble falling this hard for Delia at first. Theidea of love, and being loved and committed to someone, other than Delia, scared him.

**_'I'm OK. I'm at the shop. I'm probably going to stay at the trailer tonight', _**was his reply. He didn't want to be awkward around her, and he knew that if he stayed with her he'd feel guilty.

**_'What did I do? R U mad at me?'_**

**_'No, I'm not mad at u. Why would I be mad?'_**

**_'U left quickly. Thought I done something. Can I stop by the shop?'_**

**_'Sure.'_**

Not even three minutes later, she was knocking frantically on the door. His heart skipped a fewbeats as her tear-stained face came into view. He pulled her into a hug quickly. He'd take all the pain away from her if he could. "What's wrong, Jan? C'mon, talk to me."

"I thought you were mad at me. I…I thought I did something to upset you. I don't like arguing with you," she whispered.

"I'm fine, sweetheart. Just got too crowded for me. You know I'm a non-sociable fuck." He chuckled and kissed the top of her head. "I love you. I'm not mad at you, alright? Dry your tears, baby."

She hugged him tighter to her and nodded, laying her head against his chest. "I was so scared, Jon."

"Why where you scared, baby? You didn't do anything wrong. C'mon, let's go back to the office, okay," he said, his forehead already starting to sweat from the heat in the humid shop.

As they walked through the shop, she walked so close to him that he could feel her heat against his arm and they weren't even touching. Janice was clingy, but he sometimes liked that in a girl. She was all he wanted, but she still wasn't Delia.

When he sat down on the couch, he pulled her so that she straddled his lap on the leather couch. She kissed his forehead and whispered, "I was scared because I love you so much."

He placed soft kisses to her neck. "There isn't anything to be scared of, though. I just needed some fresh air, ya know?"

"Fresh air…away from…from me?" She questioned him sadly.

"No," he laughed softly. "Not away from you in particular. Sometimes I just need…space. It's not anything against you…it's just how I am. I get in moods and I just want to be left alone. It's nothing towards you. Promise baby girl."

"Did you see…her?" Janice's voice was full of despair. She wasn't dumb and he knew it.

He nodded slightly. "Yeah. I saw her."

"Is that why you're so edgy? Because you see that she's…pregnant? Is that your baby, Jon?"

"It did hurt to see that she was pregnant so quickly after we broke up. But, it's all in the past now. That isn't my baby," Jon shook his head sadly. "Even if it was…I wouldn't want anything to do with it. Its mother is a whore and I know she'd fuck that baby's life up just as well."

"That's not so," Janice shook her head. "You never know how someone would act in motherhood until you actually see them as mothers."

"Yeah, whatever. Enough about her, I'm done talking about her." He grinned deviously. "I say we put this couch to good use."

"Does everything have to be sexual with you?" She chuckled, running a smooth fingertip over his bottom lip and then kissing him softly.

"No, but it usually is," he mumbled against her lips, his hands rubbing up and down her thighs. She smiled and pressed her lips to his again, tangling her fingers in his hair. The friction her hips had caused in his jeans was heavenly. She could feel him rubbing against her through the fabric of her tight skinny jeans. They broke away from the kiss with a soft pant, both of them silently begging the other to continue their game. He was so turned on, so hard and needy for her that when she swept her hips down hard against him, the moan that escaped was purely animalistic.

His skilled fingers popped the buttons to her jeans as she stood up over him, her feet on either side of his body that rested against the couch. He licked his lips as he looked up at her and rested his head back against the cushiony area supplied. With his help, she stepped out of the clingy jeans and turned around so that when she bent over, he got a great visual of her panty clad-ass. Skillfully, she bent over as she pulled the panties down her legs and smiled as she felt him rub her lower legs and the soft skin that laid there.

"So fucking sexy," he mumbled, his cock straining hard against the front of his pants as he watched two of her fingers rub at her clit and she teasingly swayed her hips. Again, with his help, she stepped out of the panties. This time, she took a few steps back and bent so that her sopping pussy was right in front of him as she unbuckled his pants and pushed them down his hips, his hard cock immediately popping back up once it was rid of the confinements. By the time she took his head into her mouth, he was already sucking and licking at her outer lips, teasing her as he trailed slow circles around her hole. Her hips ground up against his face, trying to get his tongue deeper in her when he fucked her with it.

"Love it when you tongue-fuck me," she whimpered, her hand furiously stroking his cock as she whined and moaned. That was another thing he loved about her, she wasn't afraid to tell him what she liked and what she needed when it came to sex. Delia, she was good and she felt amazing wrapped around him, but Janice was just sexual while Delia strived for some sort of passion. He knew he was Delia's first sexual partner, and he let the opinion thing slip.

Before he knew it, she was impaling herself down around him. A harsh slap to the ass left her reeling and moaning as she rode him, her hips working quickly down around him. Their moans and grunts left the small office filled with sexual noises.

"Fuck…just like that…goddamn who taught you how to fucking ride?" Jon moaned out, pressing his thumb against her clit.

She leaned against him and moaned, his cock sliding deeper in her, but she never slowed her pace. She stared him in the eye as she rode him harder, her breath coming in short pants as she came harshly around him. "So good…fuck your cock is so fucking good."

"You just love having my cock deep in that tight pussy, don't you?" He growled, fisting a large amount of her hair as he slid further down in the couch so that his hips hung off the edge. He ground his feet against the floor as his hips snapped up into her and he held her still.

"Love the way you fuck me," she whimpered and ground down against him. "Make me your fucking whore. You love it, don't you?"

"Fucking right I do," he groaned, that familiar tightening feeling coming on stronger and stronger.

"Oh fuck," she gasped, feeling his thumb rub harder at her sensitive clit. "Gonna cum for you. Need it. Need it so bad…I…oh fuck."

Whatever she finished that sentence with didn't make sense in Jon's ears, and hearing her incoherent sentences made him swell with pride, knowing he had taken her to that level of pleasure. She cried out louder as he felt her pulse around him and she rode out her orgasm on him. "Fuck yeah, baby girl. Feels so good. So fucking good."

She grinned sheepishly and tangled her fingers tighter in his hair. "Cum for me baby," she whispered in his ear. With that, he was gone. Toppling over the edge, his cock throbbed deep inside her and she kissed him harshly, catching and swallowing his moans as she softly rode him. She ran a hand through his hair, smiling as she watched him try to catch his breath before he finally spurted out, "Fuck."

* * *

"Well, Mrs. Lynn….looks like it's going to be a boy!" The doctor smiled sweetly at her, "Any idea on names yet?"

"No," Delia lied. "Not yet."

"Well, only four more months!"

"Yeah," Delia chuckled. "I'm a little anxious to meet him. I thought it was going to be a girl. Thank God I haven't bought any pink things yet, huh?"

"Very thankful," the doctor laughed. "Well…I'd like to see you again in three to four weeks, Mrs. Lynn. The two of you are very, very healthy. Congratulations!"

"Thank you very much," Delia smiled softly.

After she had gotten dressed and had told her mother the news of her future grandson back at home, Delia made her way upstairs to her room. She and Adam were staying with them until they found a house of their own. Delia would be transferring to a college closer to her mother in the fall. She wasn't happy about it, but then again, it's what was best for her baby.

The thought of boring Jon's baby is what kept her strong. She knew this little boy would have a great head on his shoulders once he was born. He'd be better away from Jon. She could teach him how to live normally, without an emotional mess for a father. Jon wasn't stable. For all she knew he could have been higher than a kite the night he had come to surprise her at college. Unstable people do unstable things and that was no environment for her baby. Her baby deserved the finest things in life, with a stable father and mother who loved each other.

Jon didn't love her, she knew that. He had proven that when the two of them were away from each other. She realized it wasn't her acting irrationally. She never raised a fist to a member of his family, she never called him any names, that was always on him. And she sure as hell never pushed him, or laid a finger on him in a harmful manner. But the bruises from him pushing her had finally started to fade and she was glad. Maybe she could forget about that horrible night. He acted so dumb – he wanted her to move on. He said he wanted to be friends. That's what she was trying to do and everyone treated her like a piece of shit.

When you become a mother, you are no longer just looking out for yourself. You have a life to support, a life to love and cherish other than your own. This wasn't just about her anymore. It was for the safety of her baby. And if that meant keeping the baby away from his unstable father, then call her the bad guy in this situation. Tears of hurt and anger had welled up in her eyes as she lay in bed, rubbing her bulging belly. Being five months pregnant was hard, but she had continued to manage it nicely. None of her normal clothes fit, and she mostly wore dresses or some of Adam's shirts. She wouldn't have changed anything, though. She loved Adam. Yes, there was still a deep unconditional love for Jon, but she knew better than to live off of false hope. She would never get him back. She wasn't ignorant, she was going to move on with her life and be happy for her family, hers and Adam's son.

"Hey baby boy," Delia smiled softly as she began rubbing her belly. "Things might be confusing for you. I promise to protect you at all costs. Whatever it takes. You'll always be my number one priority. I love you, Dylan. I was wanting to name you after your father. He has a pretty name…I hope you look like him. I hope, later in life sometime, you understand why I did all of this. And I hope you don't ever, ever hate me for keeping you away from him. Your father isn't any good, Dylan. You'll see one day, okay sweet boy? No matter what, mommy will always love you. Mommy and daddy Adam will always be here for you. You're going to complete us. Make everything better. I know you will."

* * *

Jon's head hurt as he tapped the pen on the desk, watching as it bounced back and forth in his fingers. It had been two weeks since that haunting image he saw at the Fall Festival. He had lost her, and he knew she'd forever be tied to that asshole, even if they were to miraculously get back together. He still held on tight to hope.

Taking the top off of his bottle of water, he heard the nob on the office door start to turn. It opened to reveal Janice's pretty makeup-free face. She smiled at him and he felt his heart skip a few beats. She came over and sat in his lap, wrapping her arms around his neck as she did so. "Hi."

Kissing the exposed part of her back, he mumbled against her skin. "Hi."

"I have something to ask you," she smiled.

"Shoot," he said, rubbing small circles on her thigh.

"Have I done anything to upset you?" She kept her tone calm.

"What?…No!" He shook his head. "Sorry if I made you feel that way."

"You still love her, don't you," she asked, smiling sadly.

"No," he lied. "I don't love her."

"We may have only been together a couple months, but I know when you're lying," she chuckled. "It's okay to love her. But…you've got someone else to love. And don't you love the new one anymore than me."

"What?" Jon cocked his head. "You're not making any sense."

She chuckled and placed his hand over her stomach. With a huge smile, she turned to look at him. "I'll see you at home, Poppa."

* * *

_**Say whhhhhhaaaaaaattttttttt?**_  
_**Review! And tell me what you think of 'poppa'?**_


	13. Chapter 13

"I'm about a month," Janice said that night as she stood over the stove, stirring the pot of boiling water. Jon couldn't believe it. She was pregnant; he was going to be a father. It wasn't with the woman he wanted it to be with, but he was going to have a child. Nine months seemed far too long in his eyes. Questions flooded his mind as he sipped at his beer but he couldn't comprehend the news. _He was going to be a father._

"Jon?" She grinned and looked over her shoulder at him. "You alright?"

"Yeah," he smiled and nodded. "I'm just…happy."

She giggled and moved to bend over and kiss him softly, cradling his face as she did so. He closed his eyes and the kiss deepened with passion as he wrapped his arms around her waist. Her thumbs trailed over his cheek bone before pulling her head back and smiling at him. "Hope you're hungry."

"Starving, babe," he smirked and brought the bottle back up to his lips as he watched her walk off.

He somehow couldn't believe it. She was pregnant, with his kid, and he was going to be a father. They ate and talked about their day. He always enjoyed listening to her take on the gruesome day, and how she was glad to be at home. He had been an entire month without Delia, without hearing her voice. He was ready to take the next step. He was done with her, he didn't need her anymore. She was nothing to him, she was already pregnant with another man's baby, so why did he even hurt himself with false hope? It was time to move on from her. She didn't matter anymore. He had a new life now, and it was in the being of Janice. She was jaw-droopingly beautiful now to him. Not that she wasn't before, but she was now carrying his child. Life was looking up for him, whether he was to ever come in contact with Delia again or not. In that moment, he let everything he felt for her go.

He felt better afterwards. It seemed to lift things for him. He didn't feel pressured any longer. After the leftovers had been wrapped up and stored away in the refrigerator, they ended up in bed. He laid his head on her stomach and kissed it softly through her shirt as her fingers ran softly through his shaggy hair. He was so sleepy, but as usual, sleep eluded him. He groaned and looked up to find her wide awake.

"Love you," she smiled.

"Love you, too."

"So," she smiled, "I was thinking maybe you'd like to move in with me…fully."

That shocked him a little. That was a huge move. He took a deep breath and pursed his lips a little. "I don't…think that's a good idea. Not this soon, you know? Scotty's job has been pissy lately and he's running low on money…"

"Oh." He could hear the disappointment in her voice. "That's cool, too. Just know you always have a bed here."

"Thanks," he smiled softly. "Let's get some sleep, huh?"

"Yeah." She smiled sweetly at him, watching as he moved to turn the lamp off and then switched positions with him, moving to lay her head on his chest. Jon laid there for a few minutes, watching and listening to things as her breath slowed and she slowly drifted off to sleep. He joined her a few minutes later with smile on his face. He could get used to this.

* * *

"So," Angela piped up over her menu. "What did your mother have to say about all of this?"

Delia shrugged. "Does it really matter?"

"Of course it matters, D! She's _your mother."_

"But it's my baby-"

"No!" Angela scoffed and pointed a finger at Delia. "You didn't make it on your own. That isn't just your baby. That's Jon's baby as well."

"Can you please just shut up about that entire subject," Delia groaned. "I'll tell him when the time is right."

"The right time was five months ago!" Angela laughed. "What are you naming him?"

Delia shrugged. "Dylan."

"Dylan?"

"Yeah."

"Is that all?"

"Dylan Jonathan Good," Delia whispered.

Angela glared at her. "So now you're naming it after him, too?"

"Stop criticizing me," Delia defended herself and sipped at her Pepsi.

Angela shook her head and dove back into her menu, searching for something to eat. She couldn't believe Delia right now. She was being stupid, but she understood that it was her baby. Angela couldn't do anything about it. The two ordered their food and gossiped about the newest drama in town while they waited.

"Angela?" Delia asked after swallowing the food. "Can I ask you something?"

"Yeah, 'sup with it?" Angela grinned.

"Maybe, when he's…he's born…if Jon finds out and tries to come see me, promise not to let him back there?" Delia asked.

Just to keep Delia's nerves calm, Angela agreed. "Yeah. I can do that. But question, why don't you want him there?"

"Just don't," Delia said softly. "It's not like I expect him to be there…but then again, I didn't expect him to come to the college, either."

"True."

The two friends finished their lunches and soon were on their separate ways. Delia went back to her mother's house. She rolled her eyes at the amount of cars in the front of the house and the pathetic looking boys who stood around Adam. She knew them, they had come to visit from the college. She didn't like them, and especially didn't like the girl that was standing a little too close for her comfort beside Adam.

"Hey baby," Adam smiled as she walked up to him and planted a soft kiss to her lips. "You alright?"

"Yeah," she nodded and rubbed her stomach. "Think I'm gonna go lay down."

"I'll be in soon," Adam kissed her softly again before she walked off.

The girl who Delia wasn't too fond of had a pretty shrill voice, so it traveled to Delia's ears when she heard her say. "Man, D's gotten fat."

But what hurt worse was when Adam answered, "Yeah, she has."

Delia quickly closed the door and stood behind it with tears streaming down her face. Sometimes she craved Jon. Times when Adam was acting like she didn't matter to him. She missed him now more than ever. It wasn't like she was trying to get fat, she couldn't help she was gaining weight. Adam seemed to be disgusted by her now. She knew she was making a mistake, but if she gave up on her determinations, she would ruin Jon's happiness. She didn't care, she had to talk to him. She needed to tell him. She picked up the phone as she made her way upstairs and sat on the edge of her bed, pushing the memorable numbers in after she blocked her number.

On the fourth ring, he answered. "Yeah?"

Her heart pounded, she wanted to speak up and talk to him. She couldn't. He kept repeating, "Hello?", and she just sat there, listening to his voice for the first time in five months. She had done this long, she couldn't give up on her plans. It took everything in her to hang the phone up without saying anything. It hurt her heart, but she knew it wasn't the right time.

Something inside of her sensed that she shouldn't tell him. Maybe something bad was going to happen. She didn't know. She just couldn't tell him. She laid back in the bed and remembered back to the time they had sex. She could still feel him there, Adam had yet to wash away how he made her feel. Adam could never replace Jon's spot in her life, even though she had tried to forget him.

There wasn't another Jon. She had looked and he couldn't be found. She would settle for second best, even though she knew they both deserved to be happy.

Jon huffed as he looked down at the phone after the bizarre phone call. He shook his head at the thoughts that ran through it. That wasn't Delia. Even though it sounded like her sniffles, he had to convince himself that wasn't her. She didn't love him anymore, there was no hope of the two of them ever getting back together. He kept repeating those thoughts in his mind as he worked on the car at hand.

She had Adam, she didn't need him anymore.

* * *

**So...uh...boom. **  
**_Boom.  
Review!_**


	14. Chapter 14

Delia was now six months pregnant. She was pretty big given her normal weight. Her clothes didn't fit right and she was always aggravated at something. Adam didn't make anything better. He wasn't supportive through anything. None of her tests, none of her cramps or sickness, none of it. He sat on the couch and ate potato chips while she cleaned his mess in her mother's kitchen. They were looking to move out into their own apartment before long. As a family. A family that Delia highly doubted would last, but it was worth a shot.

She was currently in Wal-mart, looking for maternity clothes, but to no avail. So she had made her way over to the baby section. She searched through endless piles of shades of blue. She was tired of seeing blue. Little boys could be dressed in other colors, right? She had blue everything. Sometimes the shades were too light for her and reminded her of those familiar eyes. She hoped Dylan had Jon's eyes, they were always one of her favorite things about him. They showed so much more emotion than he let slip out of his mouth. He could tell stories with those eyes sometimes.

She laughed humorlessly to herself and sat the article of clothing back down before moving further into the aisles, immersing herself in the land of baby clothes. This would be her life for a while. She could get used to it. Dylan was kicking up a storm, more than usual tonight. She found he kicked more when she wasn't around Adam, like he was happier or something. Deep down, she knew they were both happier when he wasn't around. She longed for time away from him sometimes. But he was a warm body to keep her bed occupied at night. He wasn't what she wanted, though. Everyone seemed to see it. Except Adam, of course.

Things with Adam had gotten worse, actually. She hated seeing him unless he was asleep but she didn't have the heart to make him leave. He didn't have anywhere to go. He had no family, all of them had abandoned him. She wasn't going to be like his family, she wasn't going to leave him. She loved Adam and had decided that he was her future. She walked around the corner, not expecting to see what she saw. Her heart fluttered and she gasped a little too loud, causing the one love of her life to turn around before she could get out of sight.

Jon was looking for prenatal vitamins, and had about four bottles in his hand when he turned around to see Delia standing there, pregnant belly and all. She looked like she was on the brim of tears, and it hurt him to see such a pretty girl so brokenhearted. He should talk to her but he didn't know what to say, or do, so they just stood there in awkward silence, looking at each other. Taking in the new appearance the both of them adorned.

Jon looked skinny. He had lost a lot of weight; he was far from the big meaty man he was when they were together. She wondered if Janice took care of him or if he was on something. His clothes were too baggy, his arms weren't as plump, and his face looked sunken. He had cut his hair; it was now up to his ear where as it was at his shoulders when they were together. He was wearing a pale yellow shirt and holey jeans. He still looked good, he'd always look good to her. But this wasn't her Jon. Her Jon took care of himself and was healthy. This was Janice's Jon, and it looked like she was killing him.

"Hey," he said softly as he scratched the back of his neck. This felt awkward and they both hated it.

"Hey," she nodded and looked down at her palms. "How are you?"

"Good," he said even softer. "How are you?"

"I'm plump," she laughed softly, earning a grin from him.

"I see that," he laughed. "How far along are you?"

"Six months." She felt her cheeks burn. "Three more to go. If I go that far."

Jon knew he should tell her before she found out from someone else. She hadn't noticed he had the bottle of vitamins in the buggy. "Yeah, Janice still has seven months."

His words hit like a ten ton brick. She felt the wind leave her lungs. She was pregnant. He was going to have another kid, by another woman, and he didn't even know about his son. She swallowed her tears and put on her best fake smile. Jon saw straight through it. He knew her like the back of his hand, nothing of her had changed.

"Congratulations," she smiled at him. "That's…that's great news, Jon. I'm happy for you."

Seeing the fake smile plastered on her face hurt him even more. She looked miserable in her own body. Like she hurt all over. Jon didn't know what was wrong with her. She was pregnant with Adam's baby, so why did she fake that smile?

"Yeah," he shrugged and gritted his teeth. "Thanks. I'm…happy for you, too."

He wanted to touch her. He didn't know what he was doing, but he was walking closer to her. She tensed up when he wrapped his arms around her, pulling her tighter against him. It felt right to have her so close to him, feel her pregnant belly pressed against him.

"It's your baby," she said but no sound came from her lips. It's like her voice was taken from her. She couldn't talk. Only her lips moved. She let out a choked sob and breathed in the scent of him. Everything they ever felt about the other slowly came creeping back. She couldn't take touching him and not being able to have him. Why did he have to hug her? Why didn't he understand that she couldn't be with him? She had no sense of self control around him and it scared her. He made her forget the bad things, made it all feel right. Even worse, as soon as he touched her, Dylan stopped kicking.

She broke the hug and stepped back from him, not looking up at his face. She knew what she would see. Disappointment, disgust, and she deserved all of it. She knew she did. Delia knew what she did was wrong, she knew she should have just told him. 'It's your baby' were just three words. But they were hard words to say; hard words to form. She couldn't do it.

"I'm sorry, Jon," she said softly. "I'm sorry for being so mean to you. I'm sorry for cheating. I'm sorry for leaving. I'm so sorry, Jon. For everything."

"Hey," he said as he tilted her head back. "It's alright. We all make mistakes. Maybe we just aren't meant to be together, ya know?"

That hurt even worse. He didn't want to be with her, she could see it in his eyes. The way he said it. Maybe he really did love Janice. She'd known she'd be the one in the cold when all of it was over. She deserved it. She didn't deserve to have Jon's baby, didn't feel worthy of having this Adonis's child.

"Yeah," she said sadly.

He hung his head and stuck his hands in his front pockets before shuffling on his feet to get comfortable. "You know…I still love you, Delia."

She shook her head sadly. "Yeah. I know. I love you too, Jon. I always will. But maybe, we shouldn't love each other anymore. You have a family now, okay? Love Janice. You've got to love Janice."

"Do you not think I've tried that? I love her. But I'm not_ in_ love with her. I'm in love with you. I always will be. I've tried telling myself that I'm not, but who the hell am I trying to kid? It's supposed to be me and you. I didn't mean to get her pregnant and now I'm chained to her for forever. I don't want a kid, Delia. Look at me. Fatherhood doesn't suit me very well. Do you know how much I hate kids? And so, I lie awake and I think of you. It's only ever been you, D. Why can't you see that?"

Delia placed a hand on the side of his face and looked up into his eyes, "You're going to be a great dad. I'm sure of it. Janice is a lucky girl to have you, and your baby will be even luckier. You said it yourself, Jon. We aren't meant to be together, and it hurts, but it's the truth. I've lied awake at night and thought of you, too. Countless times. Adam will never live up to my memories of you, but Jon, we can't be together. We've proven that."

"Why is this so complicated?" He laughed humorlessly. "Good things never happen for us. Do you realize this?"

"Yeah." She smiled sadly. "I realize it. But, good things are happening for us. We have babies on the way."

"Yeah." He shrugged, "But it'd be better if it was yours."

His phone started ringing and she pulled her hand away from his face, already missing the touch of his stubble. He talked swiftly with whoever was on the phone and sighed before hanging up. "I gotta go. But listen, maybe we can get together or something. We'll all go out to eat. Or something. I don't know. I miss you, Delia."

"I miss you too," she said softly. She missed him more than he'd ever know. "We'll hang out sometime, alright?"

"Yeah." He gave her a weak grin. "I'll see you around, ok?"

"Yeah." She smiled softly, watching as he turned to walk off. She gathered what she needed from the shelf, consisting of diapers and bottles, before walking off. She was almost to the registers when she heard someone calling her name. She turned around to see Jon sprinting back to her.

"Jon, what are y-"

She was cut off by him yanking her towards him and covered her lips with his mouth, his lips crashing down on hers, his hands holding the back of her head. She wanted so bad to push him away, to stop this, but she couldn't. She'd wanted this far too much for far too long. His tongue tasted tentatively and her lips responded, allowing him the entrance that he sought. They didn't care they were in the middle of Wal-mart, where people were surrounding them and staring at them weirdly. That's what their entire relationship had been anyway, people wondering why the preacher's daughter was with the town's screw-up. But in reality, it was the other way around. Everyone saw Jon as the bad guy normally, but now it was Delia. And it stung to know that she had all these expectations built up about her that she'd never be able to live up to.

Jon broke the kiss shortly, the both of them panting slightly. "I'm sorry," Jon stammered as he broke away from her. "That wasn't right. Fuck. I'm sorry."

Delia's heart was beating so fast it felt like it was going to burst out of her chest. Without any further words, he turned around and walked off. She looked down at her stomach and sighed heavily. She didn't know what to do. She knew what she needed to do, but Jon had Janice now. Someone who wouldn't fuck him up mentally. Someone who didn't hide her pregnancy from him. Someone who could love him like he needed, if he'd just let her. Jon deserved that. He deserved that family. Not a family with a spiteful mother and a bastard child.

Jon paid for the vitamins and quickly made his way out to his car. His head was spinning. His heart was racing. He knew he shouldn't have kissed her, but he couldn't help himself. Everything he felt about her was back, and it was on strong this time. He drove mindlessly back to the apartment as he thought about her. Why was his life always so complicated? For once, he wanted to have a normal week without any stressful things happening. But, it seemed like that wasn't going to happen any time soon.

* * *

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	15. Chapter 15

Things weren't easy for Jon. Not since seeing Delia in Wal-Mart. He seemed distant from Janice, and he didn't even mean to. It just happened. He didn't want her. And he felt bad because Janice was carrying his baby. But when he was touching Delia, he _felt _something. And it wasn't like any time he had ever hugged Delia or touched Delia. He had started to wonder if Janice's child really was his. Or if it was some other drug addicts child, and if Delia was pregnant with his baby.

But to him, the dates didn't add up. He'd thought about it all the time, it occupied his brain. Something wasn't adding up to him. Hell, Janice and him had barely been together a month when she came up pregnant. He'd never know unless there was a paternity test and he didn't want to drag the baby, nor Janice, through all that stress. It would look bad on him if it came back positive. He trusted Janice, and that was a lot coming from a boy who constantly had his heart ripped out.

Jon was in the blistering hot mechanic shop on his own today, he had sent everyone else home. He didn't want them to be there, he wanted time alone and this was the only place he found solitude in the clanging of power tools on metal. This shop felt like home to him. It was safe to say that Jon was at a crossroad in his life. On one track, he could go and try to patch things back up with Delia. They could live happily together, but that meant he'd have to deal with Adam. And there was always the possibility of Delia running again. On the other hand, he could stay with Janice. A girl he knew who loved him. But there was the possibility of the baby not being his. He knew Janice wouldn't hurt him in the long run.

He looked up at the portrait of his late grandfather and huffed, "Tell me what to do, pops. I'm confused as fuck."

Just as the words left his mouth, the front door opened and in stepped some shabby looking wannabe Hollywood actor with too much cologne on. Jon could smell it from five yards away. He took in the face and anger pinged deep inside of him. He knew that face. Many of nights he'd wanted to hunt the face down and punch the ever-living shit out of it until he was a bloody pulp.

Jon had to admit, Adam was a nicely built guy with a lot of muscle tone to him. Adam was bigger and taller than Jon, but that didn't mean anything. Jon had taken on bigger men than Adam when he was a teenager. The buff bleached blonde guy didn't bother him, didn't threaten him, and he sure as fuck wasn't scared of him. If Adam was here to try to fight, then so be it. Jon had a lot of anger built up, anyway.

"Sup, dude?" Adam nodded.

"Ah. Not much, _dude." _Jon rolled his eyes.

"Can we talk?"

"Depends," Jon shrugged, "What you need?"

"Can I come back there?" Adam asked, standing at the edge of the counter and looked back at Jon in the slightly darker part of the grimy garage.

"Sure," Jon shrugged, leaning against the car and crossing his arms over his chest.

To any other person, Jon would have looked intimidating. But to Adam, he just looked like a jack ass. He wasn't scared of Jon, he wasn't scared of anyone. Adam was known to have a horrible ego, and it showed. Especially to Jon.

Once Adam was standing in front of Jon, he mirrored his image, and took a deep breath. "I'm just letting you know to keep your fucking hands off of my girl."

Jon chuckled softly, "Oh boy. Hollywood's going to threaten me, huh? Listen here, kid. I'm not one to fuck with, alright? So why don't you just turn around, take your bleach blonde ass outta my shop, and go back home?"

"Because you need to learn respect."

"Oh goodie, learn something new every day I guess." Jon scoffed, "I don't have time for you today."

"Make time and make it now. Delia isn't yours anymore. You left her, so get over the fact that she's mine."

"I left her? Wait a minute, wait a minute." Jon laughed sarcastically, "_I left her? _No, no son. I think I walked _in _on her cheating on _me _with _you. _So, if _anyone _left, it was her."

"She must have not been to worried about you, huh?"

"Listen," Jon growled, "I don't want your little girl back, alright? I have a girlfriend. Mine and Delia's relationship is fucking complicated as is, we don't need you're arrogance in the middle of it. You have her, that's obvious. You have a family with her, so go be with your family and get the fuck out of here, alright?"

"You're dumber than you look, you know that Jon?" Adam laughed; he'd always find it humorous that Jon thought it was his baby. He wanted to tell Jon the truth, just to see the agony on his face at the fact that Adam would be raising his baby, he wanted to hurt Jon. But he knew it wasn't his place. Adam may have been ignorant, but he wasn't that stupid or cruel.

"Says the _bleached blonde_ man standing in front of me. I've got a lot of work to do today, so why don't you just leave? It's either you leave willingly or I make you leave. Take your fucking pick."

"Alright, fine!" Adam said as he threw his hands up, "It's a warning, Jon. Next time, I'm not going to be so nice."

Adam could feel Jon's icy stare bore into his back as he made his way out of the shop. He wasn't scared of Jon, not a lot of men intimidated Adam. He knew Jon was a dangerous guy, Delia had told him all about Jon's criminal history when she learned that Adam had been arrested for pretty much the same thing.

Adam was fifteen when he beat his uncle into a coma after walking in on finding him sexually molesting his younger sister. He hated men who played on women's feelings, used and hurt them. Physically, emotionally, mentally, and sexually. Adam wasn't a saint, he knew that, but he was a whole hell of a lot better than that piece of white trash of Delia's ex.

"Did that go over well?" The small blonde girl asked as soon as Adam was back in his car.

Adam bent over a little and placed a soft kiss to her lips. "I think he got the message."

"Good," She smiled, "Where's your fat bitch anyway?"

"At home," Adam shrugged, "Or at least that's where she should be. Mary, you hungry?"

"Fuck yeah I am!" She smiled as he started the car.

Jon continued to stare at the car that Adam had disappeared into after exiting the shop. His blood boiled, he was beyond pissed. It felt like every nerve in his body had turned to lava and he was trembling with anger as he heard Adam's car start-up. He realized that Adam had a passenger then and all he could see was what looked like a familiar head of blonde hair. His shoulders slumped in defeat.

To him, it looked like Delia had sent him in here to tell him that she basically didn't want anything else to do with him. Delia wanted him to leave her alone. And he didn't know if he could, but for her, he'd try. But that didn't mean he didn't feel his heart crumbling in his chest, that ache came back after he had walked in on the two in the dorm rooms. He'd never have Delia again. And maybe all it took was Adam to snap him back into that reality.

For Delia, it had been two weeks since the meeting in Wal-Mart, and she could still feel him. It's something she'd never let go. She found herself dreaming about him even more now, missing him at night, she couldn't even try her hardest to imagine it was Jon when she and Adam were intimate. She had gotten a taste of Jon and she couldn't help herself for wanting more.

She was sitting on the patio at her mothers, looking over the listings in the local newspaper for houses. She only had two more months until baby Dylan would be entering the world, and she was beyond happy about that, but she wasn't ready financially. She was still living with her mother, and Adam wasn't helping her out at all with the baby furniture. It wasn't the first time she realized he wouldn't be a very fit parent, she was better off as a single mother.

All of a sudden, her phone rung and she looked down at the caller I.D. The name shocked her a little, but she answered anyway.

"Jon?"

"What the fuck is your problem, Delia? What did I ever do to you to make you hate me?"

"Jon, what are you talking about? I don't hate you."

"Oh, so you're just going to send your little Hollywood wannabe boyfriend in here to basically tell me to fuck off, right? Well fuck you Delia."

"Adam is at work, what the hell are you talking about?"

"Adam was standing right here in front of me, basically threatening me to keep my hands off of you!" Jon screamed, his voice cracked harshly at the end, "And then I fucking see you in the car afterwards! So don't fucking try and play the saint here, Delia. I know how you are, I know. But if you're done with me, then just fucking tell me. If you honestly do not want to be with me, tell me. Don't give me false hope, D."

"Jon," Delia's voice trembled, "I've been at the house all day…"

There was a long drawn out silence as the two stood in shock at what Jon had just realized. That wasn't Delia in the car. That was another girl. Jon wasn't going to tell her that he saw the two kiss. He might have hated Delia at the moment, but he wasn't going to completely crush her. That wouldn't be safe for either her or the baby. He'd already said too much. "D, I'm sorry…I didn't know…fuck…maybe it was his sister or something…maybe a friend or…or a coworker."

Delia realized her worse fear. Adam was cheating on her. And by the way Jon had described the girl, she looked just like her. Delia knew Adam and Mary were close, but she thought they were only friends. Her heart pounded in her chest. "No, no. It's okay, Jon. Thanks…thanks for telling me, I guess."

"Del-"

"Jon," She cut him off, "I have to go."

She gave him no other chance to say anything, she quickly hung the phone up and sat it back down. Maybe, like Jon said, it was his coworker. Yeah. That's what it had to be. Adam would never cheat on her. She didn't believe Jon. Jon had to be lying. He was being selfish. He told her that he wasn't happy with Janice, and this was his way of getting Delia back. He wanted her to hate Adam and come running back to him.

_No, _Delia thought, _it's not happening like that._

Or maybe, just maybe, Jon could be telling the truth.

As soon as she hung up, Adam came in the door. She felt nauseated, who knew what he and that girl had done? He walked closer to her and she felt her stomach lurch to her mouth. She had to keep it together. He couldn't know she talked to Jon, when he found out about the Wal-Mart meeting, he nearly flipped on her. All she needed was a job and she could leave him, that's all she needed.

"Hey baby!" Adam grinned and bent down to kiss her, but she quickly turned her head to the side, "What the hell, D?"

"Just not feeling too good today, don't want to get you sick."

* * *

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	16. Chapter 16

"So, babe," Janice grinned at Jon as she flopped down on the couch beside him and propped her feet up on him. "Nursery themes. Only six more months to go!"

"Don't you think we should wait a little bit longer before we jump into buying things like that?" Jon merely sipped at his beer. She was interrupting his game time, which the Bengals were getting stomped in.

"Well, I want to go ahead and get the other room painted at least," she huffed. "I was thinking pale yellow. Since we don't really know the sex of it yet-"

"Pink," Jon spoke up.

"But babe, that's not a neutral color!"

"We don't need a neutral color, it's going to be a girl. I can feel it." Jon smirked, bending over to kiss the three month pregnant belly that was barely visible, but she was growing bigger every day. Jon found the slight bump cute. Janice wasn't naturally a big girl, her body was tight and she was no taller than 5'3. She was a tiny person.

"So sure, aren't ya," She giggled, wrapping her arms around his bicep and kissing his shoulder.

Jon could admit that he was falling for her. After that day at the garage, Jon realized there was no use in trying to get Delia back. The last he had heard about her was that the two of them were engaged. He didn't understand how she could love him after being cheated on. But then again, maybe it's what she needed. She needed to know how Jon felt that night at the college.

Jon felt something towards Janice that he hadn't felt since the last time him and Delia were involved sexually. Although, no matter how hard he told himself that Delia was a thing of his past, he couldn't make himself believe it. But things had changed, the tides had turned. He was falling in love with Janice. She was a far cry from Delia. She didn't have all this drama surrounding her, and he found the time he spent alone with her was refreshing. He didn't feel the need to have to work for her attention or try and fit in with her family. They clicked.

Janice particularly liked the idea that Jon was so much more content in being around her lately. He seemed relaxed enough to tell her that he loved her, to hold her a little tighter at night. And when she woke up next to him in the morning, sometimes catching him awake and sometimes catching him still sleeping, she felt herself fall in love all over again. Truth is, Janice had only ever been with one other man in her entire life and that was years ago. She was never one to be sexually appealing to others; they always saw her as the other girl. But with Jon, she felt beautiful. He made her feel that way. She'd never had that in her life.

For years, she was made to think she'd always only ever be another one of 'the guys'. She had been attracted to Jon just because he acknowledged her, even if it was after giving him a birthday blowjob when he was higher than a kite, an encounter that he still didn't remember. Jon made her feel safe from her worries, safe from her fears, and when he smiled at her, he made her feel safe from herself. She didn't know what exactly made him so appealing to her- he was far from her normal pursuits. He didn't have tattoos, he didn't have black hair, and he definitely wasn't in any sort of band. The only jewelry he wore was a simple small metallic ring in his ear and a ball chain around his neck. She didn't understand why he was so sexy to her, he just was. And she didn't want to go digging through her mind at this second to try and figure it all out. No, she was content with sitting beside him, her arms wrapped tightly around his and resting her head against his shoulder.  
_

Delia was walking around the local baby supply store. She was looking for a crib mattress, and nothing seemed to catch her eye. Adam was walking beside her. With every girl that passed that was prettier than her, even in her eyes, she wondered if he looked at her as she walked past them. She was embarrassed that she knew about his escapades but didn't have the guts to ask him. Maybe this was her deja vu for cheating on Jon. Now she knew what he felt. How betrayed and ignorant he felt. She'd never do it again, to anyone. And she'd never wish this pain on anyone, either.

"Delia," Adam finally spoke up. "We need to talk."

Her heart pounded as she stopped walking and gripped the handlebars of her cart. "About?"

"About you telling Jon." Adam said confidently. "He needs to know, ya know?"

"Guess you don't want to be a dad, huh?" She shifted on her feet, her cheeks burning. She was so embarrassed to be out in public and having this conversation – why couldn't he keep it in the confines of their home?

"No," Adam shook his head. "That's not it. It's the fact that I'll be raising another man's baby. You ever realized that?"

"I'm not stupid, Adam. I know that." Delia shrugged. "It's not easy to tell him. Trust me, I've tried. I can't get the words out."

"Want me to tell him?"

"NO!" Delia quickly shook her head. "That'd just make it worse."

"Then tell him," Adam said as he took the seven month pregnant girl in his arms. "You've got to tell him."

"I just wish people would stop hounding me about it. All I want to do is be able to tell him when I'm comfortable." This was the closest she'd been with Adam since her phone conversation with Jon. She felt dirty with him, she felt worthless to him. She knew she'd never have Adam's full attention.

"It's been seven months and you still aren't comfortable enough to tell him. We're hounding you because it's the truth. I can't stand the fucker and I'm even telling you this."

"Adam are you cheating on me?" The question had been nagging her mind. She didn't know who to believe.

"What?!" He sounded shocked. "Who told you that I was cheating on you? Are you insane, D?"

"J-Jon did," She stammered. "He…he told me about the trip you made to his garage."

"Do you seriously believe him? Yeah, I made a trip to his garage to warn him to lay the fuck off of you." Adam laughed humorlessly. "That son of a bitch. You know what? Don't tell him. Don't tell him about his baby at all. He's trying to come between us, D. Can't you see that?"

"But why would he say that when he has a baby on the way?"

"Because he wants to be with its mother! He still loves you, pretty girl."

"No," Delia shook her head sadly. "His new girlfriend is pregnant, too."

"He's a little fast ass, isn't he?" Adam scoffed. "Seems to me he's the unfaithful one. Shit, he probably got her pregnant while you two were still together."

"Probably right," Delia shrugged, "Do you like the name Dylan?"

"Dylan is a perfect name, baby." Adam smiled, despite his inner rage. It felt like his blood was boiling. Who the hell did Jon think he was? He had no right telling Delia that he saw him and Mary together. Jon, in his eyes, was a fucking jerk.

Delia didn't know what to do, who to believe, or even where to turn. It seemed like life was going by a thousand miles a minute for her. Her head spun in ten different directions as she began walking further down the aisles. She just wanted to go home, curl up in a ball, and sleep for the next two months so she didn't have to endure anything. Most of all, she wished she was back in Jon's bedroom at his trailer, curled tight in his arms, as he slept soundlessly behind her.

She longed for nights like that, and it wasn't the same when Adam did it. It didn't feel as right, and she often felt disgusted that he always tried to have sex with her. Jon wasn't like that. Yes, there were nights when he did come onto her, that was a manly thing to do in her eyes. But he never demanded she have sex with him, he never _made_ her do it. And he would ease her into it. Light nibbles to the back of her neck, his hands running over her body…

A shudder ran through her body as the memories of the intimacy she shared with Jon flooded her memories. She had grown to miss him more and more every day. It was no longer a dull ache in the pit of her stomach. It felt like it grew as their baby did, and the misery weighed a ton as it sat on her shoulders. It felt like his memories weighed her down. Maybe that's all he'd be to her, just heavy memories.

Janice was walking through the same store, clutched tightly to Jon's forearm. They were looking for clothes, just to get a start on that part, but Jon had fallen in love with a swing that had cars all over it. Countless times he had said he was going to start her out working on cars as soon as she was born. Janice just laughed the thought off, but she knew he'd have her under the hood with him all the time.

They were dead set on the baby being a girl. It's what it felt like to the both of them. They'd be complete with a little girl running around. Jon could imagine a miniature Janice running around with matching black hair, but Janice hoped she took after him. She wanted a little blonde haired, blue eyed baby to call her own. The people they walked past could tell they were happy, and smiled at the young couple when they caught their eye.

Janice gripped his hand tighter when they walked around the corner and came face to face with Adam and Delia. She immediately stood straight and her face fell to something stoic. Janice could tear Delia to shreds for hurting her man, but she was still oblivious to the fact that Jon and Delia had talked in Wal-Mart.

"Uh," Jon scratched the back of his head with his free hand. "Isn't this fucking wonderful?"

Delia hung her head as Adam grabbed her wrist and jerked her off. Jon heard the soft wince she gave off when he pulled way too hard on her arm. Without letting his grip on Janice's hand falter, he moved to step in front of Adam's path, hearing the blond headed man snarl at his actions. He didn't give a shit what Adam did, but he wasn't going to hurt Delia. No matter how much he was upset with her, seeing anyone hurt the love of his life, in his eyes, was a straight shot to an oblong box buried six feet underground.

He stared Adam down as he dug his thumb into the meatier part of Adam's hand that was gripping Delia's wrist too hard, causing the enraged boy to let go of his grip. Janice saw it all happening in front of her, tears welling up in her eyes. Jon was still in love with Delia, just as much as Delia was in love with him. She saw the way she looked up at him through her bangs as she tried to hide her wondering eyes. That was how Janice looked at him. She knew that look all too well. Her eyes wandered down to Delia's belly. She could visibly see the baby moving and kicking inside of its mother due to the slightly tight shirt she was wearing. Fear crept into her body as she looked between the two. She knew. She knew it, but she didn't want to realize it until now. _Delia was pregnant with Jon's baby._

Adam wasn't oblivious to this fact either. He saw the way they exchanged knowing glances. They didn't have to say a word, they had their own silent conversation through looks. He watched as Jon's eyes widened and then a few minutes later, Delia nodded softly while she rubbed her wrist. The grip that Adam had on her really, really hurt.

Neither of the other loves said anything. Adam and Janice just looked at each other hopelessly. This just proved that they'd never have Jon or Delia fully to themselves. They could only live and hope to someday get that much love from Jon or Delia.

"Do not ever," Jon said every word like it was its own sentence, "_ever_ put your fucking hands on her again."

"Who the fuck do you think you are?" Adam scoffed, bumping chests with Jon as he stepped towards him.

"Adam, stop," Delia pleaded. "Jon you have to go."

"I'm not fucking scared of him. Fuck you, man." Jon laughed, finally letting go of Janice's wrist.

"Stop it right now, both of you!" Janice pleaded as she got in between them, pushing Delia out of the way slightly.

"Hey, watch where you're going bitch!" Delia spat as she glared daggers in the back of Janice's head.

"The fuck did you just say to me?" Janice turned sharply on her heels before quickly walking up to Delia.

"I said," Delia snarled, "Watch where you're going. _Bitch."_

"Pregnant or not," Janice cackled, "I will fuck your world up."

"Fuck off, bitch." Delia rolled her eyes. "I don't have time for you."

Janice had her first reared back, ready to swing, when Jon grabbed her and spun her around. "What the fuck are you doing? Are you insane? She's pregnant!"

"She isn't the only one!" Janice shouted, stomping hard on his foot before jerking away from his grasp and marching off.

"Janice!" Jon called, only getting flipped off and a hair flip from Janice as she continued to walk.

"You okay, D?" Adam asked as he reached for her arm.

"Don't touch me, asshole," Delia glared at him, pushing him away from her.

"Delia, what the fuck?"

"You hurt me. Intentionally," Delia said as she took a few steps back from him, leaving him standing beside of Jon, who was also staring daggers at him.

"Delia baby, don't be like this!" Adam pleaded.

"Fuck off," Delia sigh as she slowly began to walk away.

Jon turned to Adam and laughed. "You're a real charmer, Adam. Such a fucking dickhead."

"Fuck you!" Adam said as he walked off after Delia.

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_**It'll start picking up next chapter...promise.**_  
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	17. Chapter 17

It was an early December morning and Delia was now nine months pregnant. She would be going into labor any day. Her body felt like it was stretched to its breaking point - Dylan was getting too cramped in her small body. He had started to kick even more and he was already a strong little boy. She couldn't wait for him to be here. To see him, and be able to hold him. She just kept reminding herself that it wouldn't be long.

"I think I found one," Adam said as he looked up from the laptop. "It's a trailer. Over near the lookout that you used to tell me about. It's blue, says it's in mild condition."

Delia shook her head, knowing already what trailer it was. The trailer that she spent countless nights in with Jon, laughing with him, easing his worries. "No," Delia shook her head as she rubbed her stomach. "I don't want to live there."

"Delia, it's in our budget. It's two bedrooms. The yard isn't very big, but it's a start."

"I said I don't want to live there." She shot a mean glare at him. "Find something else."

He grumbled something about her being a stupid fat bitch under his breath, but she let it slide. He wasn't worth getting her baby upset over. Ever since they ran into Jon and Janice at the store, Adam had acted cold towards her. He'd go out at night and party until the wee hours of the morning, coming home way past midnight, drunk off his tail and smelling like other women. Often times, he'd have hickeys all over his neck that she knew weren't from her. They hadn't had sex in two months, and in her eyes, that was okay. She didn't want to touch him.

She figured she only kept him around to be a bed warmer, and he only did that job half the time. She couldn't kick him out, though. He had nowhere to go and it was cold out. She couldn't live with herself knowing she kicked someone she once loved out and into the cold, harsh nights. In January Adam would be going back to school anyway. Honestly, she couldn't wait for him to leave and for her to get back into the local college until Dylan was old enough to be left in the care of her mother.

She broke away from Adam that day; she had to get out of his presence. She didn't like being there, standing in front of him so he could see all her flaws. She had in her mind to go to Angela's, but she found herself going down that familiar road. The big black SUV wasn't very good at camouflaging her. Maybe he wouldn't be there. She didn't really know what she was doing, or what she wanted to get out of this trip. Maybe it was to see if he had really moved out. Or maybe it was a type of closure for her.

Delia sat in the driveway for a few minutes. Scotty's car was there but Jon's Impala wasn't anywhere to be found. She still needed to know, so she crawled out of the car and gingerly walked to the front door. After a couple of knocks, the door opened to reveal Scotty's small frame.

"Shit, when did you get back?" Scotty asked as he drew in a puff of his cigarette.

"A few months ago," she shrugged. "Uh…can I come in?"

"Yeah, man. Shit. It's kind of messy. I'm in the middle of packing," Scotty said as he pulled the door further open. Delia looked around the dirty living room and laughed to herself at all the porn magazines laid out. It seemed as if Scotty had been by himself for a while now. "You know," Scotty said as he pushed the door shut. "Jon doesn't live here anymore. I don't want to move, but since he moved out, I'm four months behind on rent. Can't keep the place. It holds a lot of memories for me."

"Yeah," Delia smiled sadly. "We've all had a few good times here."

Scotty smiled and nudged a box with the tip of his sneaker. "Yeah. We have…don't really know what else to do in order to keep it though, ya know?"

"Yeah," she shrugged. "Where did Jon move to?"

"He's been staying with Janice, even though most of his stuff is still in the back," Scotty shrugged. "Ain't seen much of him lately. She's taking him away from all of us."

"Yeah, I've noticed," Delia laughed softly.

Scotty gestured to her bulging belly. "How much longer?"

"Few days, really. Doctors say I could go any time. Has…has Jon said anything to you about Janice's due date?" Delia slowly rubbed at her belly.

"She's a couple months behind you, that's all I know. I think it's like five-ish months right now." Scotty shrugged. "Like I said, he doesn't talk to me much anymore."

"I don't understand how she could try and keep him to herself," Delia laughed sarcastically. "That's the most selfish thing to do."

"He seems to not care," Scotty bit at his bottom lip. "Like none of us even matter anymore. I've heard he's been shooting up, actually. He's gotten so skinny lately. The last time I saw him, he was almost skin and bones."

"He has lost a lot of weight, he wasn't that thick the last time I saw him either." Delia crossed her arms. "Do…do you mind if I go back there? I left one of my old scarfs in his room and I've been hesitant to come back and get it."

"Have at it, dude." Scotty gestured back to Jon's closed door. "Everything's still in there, just like he left it."

"Thanks," Delia smiled before turning on her heels and slowly walking down the hall.

She didn't know why she was afraid. Scotty had made it clear that Jon hadn't been there in forever. As Delia walked toward the room all the memories came flooding back, all the times she walked down that creaky wooden floor. She touched the door handle and immediately jerked her hand back. The sting of the memories felt like an actual shock to her skin – she couldn't do this. Why was she even here? Closure. She needed closure. Without him.

She turned the knob and was immediately hit with the scent of him. The musky cologne he used to wear all the time. The bed where they spent endless nights together - most of them being a typical young, careless couple, some of them where they just laid in each other's presence. They were happy back then. She ached for that feeling. She ached for him. And the memories of his old room did nothing but make her ache even more. She sat down on the edge of the bed and could still see him everywhere - the way he'd pull his work boots on in the morning, or the way he'd rub her back when he laid behind her. It's like she could feel him, feel that ball of energy radiating through them when they were alone again. _She felt him._

She picked up one of his shirts that lay haphazardly on the edge of the bed. It was black, and upon further inspection, it had the skull from The Punisher adorning the front of it. Delia ran her fingers over the white design. She could remember how good he looked in it. He had his hat turned backward the first time she saw him in it, and for some reason, it sent thrills through her body like no other image ever had.

Delia brought the threads to her nose and gently inhaled as tears brimmed her eyes. Suddenly that long-held pain and desire just washed over her body. She tried to hold back the choked sob, but it spewed out just like the tears did. She missed him. And it was gnawing at her insides. It ate at her conscious. She was no longer that fearless teenager she was when they first met. She had lost sight of that teenaged girl almost two years ago. Now she was a scared twenty year old woman, about to give birth to her first son, without the presence of its father in the delivery room because she, just like many other women in the world, was too much of a coward to admit that she was indeed pregnant with his baby.

She heard a car pull up from what sounded like a few trailers down but the heavy metal music, which sounded like a muffled version of Metallica's "Enter Sandman", gave its visitor away before she even heard Scotty's surprised voice echoing through the trailer. Her heart pounded. She was going to get caught here and it was going to show just how weak of a person she really truly was.

"Jon!" Scotty's voice broke through her thoughts once again as she heard the feet approaching fast against the hardwood floor.

"What?" Jon sounded disheveled and annoyed – why was he so mad at Scotty, anyway?

"Don't go in there man." Scotty sounded frantic. "There's like a mouse or something in there."

"Did you set a trap," Jon scoffed as he turned the doorknob. Delia's heart pounded even more as she closed her eyes. This was a mistake, this was all a big huge mistake.

"Yeah, but that thing was huge, man! And there was a spider's nest, too!" Scotty exclaimed, knowing Jon's fear of spiders. "Big mean looking motherfuckers."

"Well, I've got to get the title for my car," Jon sighed as he turned the doorknob.

What he saw sitting on the edge of his bed was something he'd never, ever expected to see. Ever. Delia's now red-tinged hair flowed down her shoulders as she sat there with her head bowed, his old shirt draped over her legs as she ran her fingers over the frayed print on the old threads. She was trembling, and pregnant. She'd never looked so beautiful to him, all plump and glowing. Janice never looked as pretty pregnant as Delia did. Janice's face ballooned out more than the rest of her body, and her lips swelled with the extra weight, too. But Delia's face was still as beautiful as ever, and those soft green eyes showed fear and doubtfulness.

"What uh…what are you doing here," Jon said as he stepped further into the old room and shut the door tightly behind him.

"I was looking for my old scarf." Delia used the excuse as her voice trembled with sheer anguish. It hurt to talk to him, and she couldn't look at him because she knew at the end of the day, he wouldn't be lying beside her how she wanted so badly for him to do. "Have you seen it?"

"The old red one?"

"Yeah." She nodded and wiped at her eyes.

"It's in the top drawer of the desk," Jon said as he moved to sit beside her on the bed. He was hesitant at first, but he wrapped an arm around her shoulders and pulled her to his side, kissing the top of her head. He felt her body tense at his touch and he hated it, hated having her so scared around him. What was she afraid of?

"I'm sorry," she sobbed as she moved away from him, breaking the contact as she stood up.

"For what?"

"For everything." Delia sobbed even harder. "For everything I've ever done to you. I know you hate me. I hate myself. And I have to live with what I've done. I had everything with you, Jon. And I fucked it up. I fucked it all up. That's what I am, it's what I do. Something good comes along for me and I do something to ruin it. I need some closure, Jon. I can't just let you walk out of my life. I still don't want to. You're still everything to me, Jon. You're in my head, under my skin, and I can't fucking stand it anymore. You're everywhere. I can still feel your touch, I can still smell you, and I'm getting fucking sick of the constant reminder. There are things I want to tell you, I want to tell you so fucking badly but I can't. I can't form the sentences. They stay on the tip of my tongue but when I try and tell you, it just doesn't come out right, or it doesn't come out at all. I'm fucking sorry, Jon. Okay? I'll do anything for you not to hate my anymore. I can't live with you hating me. The air, the wind, living and breathing…it doesn't make sense if you still hate me. Please." Delia wiped furiously at her eyes. "Please don't hate my anymore, Jon."

Jon looked down at his palms as he listened to her confession, her apology. Something was bugging this beautiful girl. He could tell it was gnawing away at her insides. Whatever it was, it was huge and it was something that would take time for her to tell him. He felt like he should push it out of her, tear her to shreds to find out what it really was. But something she said wasn't true.

"I don't hate you, Delia. I love you. I'll always love you, I'll always, always be in love with you. And that's not something I do easily. But pretty girl," Jon shook his head, "we can't do this. We've proven that to ourselves. We almost destroyed each other. I could never hate you, D. Don't ever think that I hate you, alright?"

Jon didn't know how he was staying so calm. Everything he wanted to say to her didn't come out right. He was weak around her, she could bring him down to his knees easily. Even though he tried to stack his guards up, hide behind the invisible barriers, he couldn't. Not in front of her. She brought out the person in him, the guy that had feelings and wasn't always so stoic. She could ravage him with a simple smile or a tear, and seeing her sob without letting him hold her, it fucking tore his heart out of his chest. He felt guilty for letting her get away.

"She's not like you, ya know?" Jon leaned his elbows against his knees. "I love her. I do. But it's not the love I have for you. Doesn't even come close to that love. And I'm sure it never, ever will. I've tried, and it doesn't seem right. It's like…like we're fucking stuck on each other and we can't let go even though it kills us inside to see the other with someone else. We like torturing ourselves too much pretty girl. And it's sick, in reality. We're sick individuals that play off the other's emotional distress."

Jon looked up at her, noticing she was standing only a few steps away from him now, like he was drawing her closer with his words. He sat back and held his arms out for her. "Can…Delia, maybe…fuck it. Can I hold you? Just for a few minutes. I want to feel you in my arms again."

She watched as he crawled back on the bed, resting his back up against the head board. She sat down beside him, tears blinding her eyes as she realized this very well might be the last time she got this. She knew she shouldn't have been here, she should still be at Angela's. But she was here and it all felt too surreal as she felt him wrap his arms around her body. Felt him pulling her to his chest. Felt the warm fabric of his shirt as it grazed against her cheek when she laid her head down on his chest. God, how she had missed this. It felt like all the worries melted away for the both of them in that split second and he pressed a soft kiss to the top of her head.

"This isn't right," Delia whispered as her finger drew lazy circles on his chest. "But I don't want it to stop. I need to feel you, ya know?"

"Yeah," Jon said softly. "I know you do. I need it, too."

Delia laid there for a few minutes and felt morbidly calm with her universe surrounding her. It felt like suffocating, beautiful, sweet death to the both of them. Death, because they knew when they left this room, the other would return to their newly acquired lovers. Jon felt the baby move underneath the palm that rested against her stomach and he had to bite back a grin. There were endless nights that he spent selfishly wishing that this baby was his. Instead, he got Janice pregnant. He had started to think all the gods were against him, or maybe they had just misinterpreted his request.

Truth was, if Delia was to speak up and tell him it was his, he wouldn't question it. He'd just feel lucky enough to share that part of her life. No doubt, it would crush him that she hid the baby from him. But it'd be sweet suffocation, a good strangling feeling in his eyes. But reality set back in, and he felt the need to push her away and kiss her all at the same time. He felt her cheek rub up against his chest when she looked up at him. Green eyes shimmered with unshed tears and he wiped them away with the padding of his thumb.

Their minds went haywire, taking their actions with them, and it almost shocked the two as they felt the sweet sensation of the other's lips against their own. His hand came up to the back of her head as he tilted his head, getting a better range on her lips. His lips against hers just felt natural -it wasn't pushed or forced like it was for them with their new partners. It came fluidly and they reveled in the missed taste of their kisses. Jon's fingers curled, bunching a section of her long hair as her hands came up to rest on the side of his neck, her thumb rubbing over the slight stubble. His tongue flicked over her top lip, and the familiar sweetness of her mouth enticed his as she parted her lips. Delia tasted just like he had etched into his memory. The taste he craved at times, the way she sighed into his mouth, and he couldn't stop himself. He needed her. All of her.

He kissed down her neck, feeling her fully relax into his bed. Her fingers ran through his hair, holding him at the base of his neck harder against her body. She needed him just as much. He knew it was going to kill the both of them afterwards when they left, and he started to try and make up excuses for them to spend the rest of their life here, but nothing reasonable came to mind. Regardless, he was having his last taste of her. Tears stung Jon's eyes and he closed them instinctively. He didn't want to look that weak in front of her. He needed to be strong for her, for him.

"Jon," Delia said softly. "Maybe we shouldn't."

Her mind was racing a million miles an hour. She could have easily given into him, let him have her. But what would either of them gain from it? Knowing that they had cheated on their new relationships? Having that guilt? Delia didn't like Janice, but she couldn't do that to the poor girl. She knew Janice loved Jon, she could see it in her eyes when she looked at him. They were full of love, and she knew that feeling towards the Adonis that was straddling her hips right now. He was goddamned perfect in every sense of the word. Rugged and beautiful, intelligent and strong. He was everything Delia wanted, and even now, as she felt his erection digging into her lower stomach, she couldn't have him.

"It's not like it's the first time," Jon whispered as he kissed her lips lightly. "I need you, pretty girl. Need you so bad. You don't know. I want to feel that deathly sensation again, I need to feel it. Don't you? I know you do, Delia. I know it."

"God yes, Jon. I do. But…you've got Janice. And, and a kid on the way with her. Don't be like me, Jon." Delia's voice dropped to a whisper. "Don't fuck it up with her."

Jon pushed himself off of her and sat at the edge of the bed. "You don't understand, do you?"

"Understand what?" Delia said as she sat up and crossed her legs underneath her.

She saw his fingers run through his hair as he gave a sharp tug to the auburn strands, "Every day without you feels like a failed day for me. I don't know why you thought I fucking hated you, when I obviously fucking don't. I can't hate you even if I fucking tried. So get that shit out of your damned mind. Shit doesn't add up to me anymore. Between you and Janice my fucking head's going to explode. I've tried loving her. I've tried forcing myself to love her. But it isn't as easy as loving you, not like I thought it should be. But you've turned out to be a real fucking challenge, you know that? Every fucking night, I lie awake with her sleeping beside me and I wonder if you're okay. If you're breathing or if numb-nuts has put his hands on you again. You lie in bed with that son-of-a-bitch and I lie in bed with someone I don't even fucking love, for the sake of my child with her. I'm fucking stuck with her now. And it's all because of you. You just…goddamn, Delia we are getting absolutely nowhere with arguing and shit so what the fuck do you want from me? You want some fucking money? Need some money for college or something? Your car broken again? Tell me what you need and I'll give it to you but you've got to stop popping up on me like this."

Delia's anger boiled to the surface as she looked at the back of him. "You think I actually want something from you, Jon?"

"You're here for some reason!" He turned on the bed. "What the fuck is it? You want to see me suffer and torture me again? Well good fucking job, Delia. You're doing a great fucking job."

"I came here for closure!" Delia shouted as she stood up off the bed. "I came here to try and get some peace of mind from you. I didn't expect you to show up - shit Scotty even said he hasn't seen you in weeks! Why are you letting her control you like that, Jon? Do you know that Scotty's losing the trailer because you've stopped paying your fucking rent?"

"No." Jon looked at her with a confused look. "How did you find that out?"

"There's an ad in the paper. Adam wanted to move here but I couldn't do it. I can't live in this trailer with a man that isn't you."

"Fuck," Jon said as he looked around the room – where the hell had his mind been these past few months?

"So I don't want anything from you. I wanted to end the memories of you that dance around in my head every fucking day when I get a second of silence. Don't fucking talk to me like I'm some gutter dog you took in from the streets."

The anger still boiled in Jon's body, and he knew he shouldn't have lashed out like he did, but the words he'd kept bottled up inside of him for so long flooded out of his mouth. "You're not a gutter dog, you're a fucking whore. I wouldn't be surprised if you told me that baby wasn't Adam's. You're a backstabbing, conniving, little fucking bitch and you live to break me down, don't you? Don't you? Tell me, Delia! You love wearing me down, putting all these fucking thoughts into my head. Tell me how you sleep at night, _pretty girl. _Does your fucking Harvard boyfriend hold you tight, or does he beat you on a nightly basis? Maybe, if he does, he'll knock some goddamned sense into you."

Delia racked her mind trying to figure out why Jon thought Adam abused her. That wasn't the case, Adam rarely touched her. Verbal abuse was there, but Adam had never gotten physically violent with her. So where were these rumors coming from?

"So you think I should be beat?" Delia wiped at the tears, her body shaking with rage. "You're a fucking son-of-a-bitch, do you realize this?"

"Oh boo hoo. Did I hurt your fucking feelings?" Jon laughed, something sinister mixed with a cackle. "What are you going to do? Going to get your big bad boyfriend to come beat me up? Do me a favor and tell him to save himself a trip to the morgue because I would fucking devour him."

Delia shook her head. Jon was finally showing his true colors. She deserved it, she knew she did, but it still hurt. She opened the top drawer and pulled her red scarf out before wrapping it around her hand and grabbing her pocketbook from the bed. She felt Jon's hand grab her wrist but she jerked away from him, not wanting him to touch her.

"Delia," Jon sighed, suddenly deflated. "I'm sorry."

"No," Delia shook her head sadly. "You aren't. You meant those things. And it's cool, I understand it. But don't worry, Jon. I won't disturb you anymore. "

"Delia, wait," Jon said as he grabbed at her wrist again.

"Please," Delia said softly as she fought against his grip. "Don't do this, Jon. We can't be together. We've discussed this. I have to go. Alright?"

Against his better judgment, Jon let go of her wrist. He watched her walk out of his room, with only a small sad smile on her lips when she looked back at him. He slid down onto the floor, his head in his hands, and he let out an involuntarily choked sob. He had just fucked everything up. Everything.

* * *

It was later that night when Delia was standing in the kitchen. She felt the sudden need to pee but before she could even take a step, it came gushing out of her, down the inside of her legs, only to pool at her feet. Her mother gasped and clasped her hands over her mouth as she took in the sight of her terrified daughter, who was on the verge of tears. Delia's water had broken and it was only her and her mother.

"Mom," Delia cried. "I think maybe…maybe we should get to the hospital."

"Go ahead to the car! I'll get your bags! I'm going to be a grandmother!" Delia's mother cheered gleefully as she bounced up the steps to Delia's room. Delia easily made her way to the car, her mind flowing a million miles a minute. She had no idea where Adam was, and truth be told, she was happier not knowing.

Before she knew it, she was in the passenger side of the speeding SUV. She had noticed it was starting to rain. Her mind hadn't quieted down since her water broke. She was scared and happy at the same time. She was going to be a mother. Her baby boy was going to be in her arms in only a few hours. Anxiety welled up in her as she felt a contraction coming on.

"Don't push," her mother said happily. "We ain't delivering that baby on the side of the road!"

"Can you go a little faster, mom?" Delia cried, the pain racking her small body. "It hurts. It hurts so bad!"

"I know it does, baby girl. But, you've got to breathe. Just breathe. In through your nose, out through your mouth. We're less than a mile away."

"It hurts so bad, mom! Oh my god!" Delia's tears stung her eyes. The hospital didn't seem close enough as they drove past a wreck. The cars looked vaguely familiar, but her brain was busy concentrating on the pain that felt like it was splitting her mind open.

A few short minutes later, they arrived to the hospital and she was whisked away into the back.

* * *

Jon was in the worst mood ever since leaving the trailer. He had left Scotty enough money to keep the trailer, over four hundred dollars. He didn't need it anyway, and he didn't want Scotty to lose the trailer. When he got to the apartment, he saw Janice dressed in a beautiful simple small black dress. She smiled up at him and rushed over to kiss him on the lips. He had been so transfixed on Delia that he had forgotten that she went to find out what they were having today.

"Hi baby," she smiled as she hugged him.

"Hey gorgeous," he mumbled against her lips before pulling away. "So…what are we having?"

"You're going to be the wonderful dad of a beautiful, beautiful….little baby girl." She grinned up at him. A sense of warmness resonated through him. That warm, happy, tingly feeling etched back into his brain and through his chest. "So, Papa, ya better get ready! We've got a Christmas party to attend!"

"Shit," Jon groaned. "I forgot about that. Do I have to go?"

"Of course, silly! I'll drop my Firebird off at your shop so you can fix the transmission before-hand and I'll just ride with you to the party, okay?"

"Fine," Jon huffed and moved into the bathroom. He quickly took a shower, got dressed, and they were on the road in no time. He stayed a few feet behind Janice since the transmission kept slipping and he had a knack for not paying attention to the road while driving. They were waiting for the light to turn green at the stop light at the end of the road. Jon was looking down at his radio when he heard the sudden screech of tires and looked up just in time to see a Ford truck smash into Janice's car.

The screech of tires and the sound of glass shattering filled his ears as his heart fell. He watched Janice's car skid along with the truck, which pinned the firebird to a building, trapping Janice in the car. Sirens immediately blasted through the air as Jon took off running toward Janice's car. He could see her bloody face resting against the steering wheel, a large shard of glass sticking out of the back of her neck. He couldn't get to her because of how the cars were pinned. He saw the lifeless look in her eyes and he felt his lips start to move but he couldn't hear the screams that came out of them.

It didn't take them long to get the truck away from the car, the driver of which was dead. They had to cut Janice's body from the bent up car. Jon's heart felt like it had long stopped beating. He watched the way her bloody arm flopped when they loaded her onto the stretcher. He rushed over to her, tears stinging his eyes as he was held back by a police officer.

"That's my baby," Jon cried hoarsely. "My baby girls. I didn't mean it. I didn't mean that I loved Delia more. I promise I didn't. I didn't mean it. I DIDN'T FUCKING MEAN IT."

"Sir," the officer said gently, "I'm going to have to ask you to step away." Jon tried to push past him, tried to get to Janice, but the officer's strong arms held him back from the carnage that he was trying so desperately to reach.

"No," Jon said frantically, clawing at the man in front of him. "Don't make me leave them. Please don't make me leave them. They need me. Janice needs me. They both need me. God, they fucking need me."

* * *

_**I want to see reviews on this one. I almost crave it.**_


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